Today has been an unfortunate reminder that just because Things are Better, trauma doesn’t magically go away.
I am doing the best I have been in my life. I feel safe in my relationship, I struggle with money but I never skip food, I’m confident in my body and transition, I can take pride in my work.
I’ve also got 35 years of deep trauma that my brain is finally dealing with and while that is good long term short term goddamn do days like today suck. Thankfully my publisher gave me an extension because I got them enough to keep things moving, so I’m able to take it easy, but…
…but I’m not gonna trauma dump to strangers on the internet today. Had some bad triggers get hit, started having flashbacks, and managed to ground myself but fuck is it hard sometimes.
Healing is hard. But now I finally have things worth healing for, and that’s nice to be able to say.
