a lot of transfems because of general societal transmisogyny get a pernicious brainworm that their sexuality is inherently predatory and abusive, and this can be made significantly worse after a scene where they're acting as the domme, especially after the emotional crash when it all finishes
so once you're in a mental state to do so (i personally know whenever i sub i take a good 5-10 minutes to be coherent enough to speak again), please please please reassure your domme that you wanted what she did to you and you enjoyed it all, and that your plays at resistance or stopping her were part of the moment and you would have safeworded if it did go wrong. seriously, it helps a lot to be able to hear that directly from the horse's mouth
and even if you do need to call a safeword, once you're emotionally recovered from whatever triggered you enough to need that, your domme is likely panicking that she hurt you permanently and you're going to abandon her and it is always worth reassuring that no, you still love her, accidents happen, things aren't always perfect.
dommes aren't kink dispensers, and transfem dommes are very likely to feel guilty for wanting to express that dominance at all. care for your dommes, y'all, it hurts when we're not cared for.
