This nightmare again. Somehow, even within a dream, Ringo could notice the villain's scars were misaligned. The scars corrected themselves on their face instantly, upon her recognition, but it was still the telltale sign she was asleep.
"Are you sure you don't want your cheesecake, my little girlie?" Luci D. Evil's voice was raspy, unnerving, and yet alluring per usual. Their tired eyes uncomfortably probing her face for emotion.
"Unhand me you- Mmmph!" Oh yeah. Ball gag. Materialized onto her face as soon as she remembered. And the chains tying her to the chair were still unnaturally heavy and unbreakable, even in dream world. And she was where? Tied up in a fancy sushi place today.
Luci twirled a stray hair into a drill as they walked out of view. "You have a good point, butterscotch."
Luci barked at one of their kigu-clad henchman "Yo- Mister Bear. Get this beautiful bitch a to-go box!"
Ringo sat there, restrained and annoyed. How come she couldn't win? Even in her dreams!
Out of the corner of her eyes, she saw her high school teacher, Ms. Bigwell. Ms. Bigwell shook her head in stern disapproval.
Luci's ostentatious, ripped up, gothic lolita dress returned to view. Luci took a dramatic chug from that bottle of vodka they always seemed to lug around.
"You must think me a villain." Luci loved to monologue "But really, I love ya baby girl! Unlike those fucking cops- you're protecting my City! And all Her beautiful people! Really I think we're quite alike. You and-"
BWAWMF
The cacophony of an incredibly offkey marching band enveloped the sushi restaurant. It was Ringo's other villainous rivals- a bunch of random monsters and newbies that always showed up each morning. This one seemed like a... villainous marching band? Really?
"Amateur hour? Again. At fucking 7am. Right at bedtime for all the good little girlies like me." dream Luci echoed Ringo's thoughts. "Well, I guess that's your job, pudding. Get to it."
BWAAAAAWMF
With a terrifyingly quick flick of the wrists, Luci freed Ringo from her chains with a magical scythe. But the freedom was already too late. Ringo was waking up.
BWAWMF
Ringo groggily grabbed her phone off her nightstand.
"Heya Ringo!" It was Orange "You must really enjoy sleeping in! Can't blame ya, first time we've had a chance to in weeks! And you're always fighting that Lucifer figure on night patrol too... Ahahaha" Orange's voice almost sounded apologetic.
Ringo gave an affirmative, half-awake girl-grunt.
"Anyway, could you patrol the industrial district? It's almost noon, and its been a little too quiet... We're uhm, all doing patrols. The rest of us woke up at 7am anyway."
"Sure." Ringo replied through a yawn.
"Great!" Orange chirped cheerily "Report in if ya see anything!" She hung up.
Ringo groaned as she got out of bed. What was she dreaming of? Whatever it was, it just made her more tired. She approached her mirror. She looked like a frumpy, overworked office worker. Bluh. It would a pain to wrestle her hair into a presentable fashion.
Well, that was what the magic was for. One half-conscious transformation sequence later, and she looked like a tired diva in lolita who's been on tour for too long. The thought hit her- maybe she should have gotten coffee before transforming. Oh well.
Ringo couldn't bother with the door. She opened the window and floated out of her apartment building. Even the little warble noises of her flying magic sounded a little too slow and like they needed a nap.
So she just had to check the industrial district. Damn it, why did the gigantic industrial district have to be her territory? Just because she liked goth raves? Punished for her good taste, Ringo supposed.
She flew from window to window on the abandoned industrial buildings. Nothing. Nothing. Yawwwwn. Nothing. Nothing. Ringo really should file for a vacation. Nothing. Nothing.
This went on for a mind-numbing amount of time. At least when she was more awake, she could entertain herself with her own daydreams. This felt tortuous. Ringo checked her phone. It was 3 already.
There was just one spot left to really check. Maybe it was unfair to call in a patrol early, but she wasn't even sure she could fight someone like this. She just had to check that one spot- a sound insulated, windowless machine room within a larger warehouse. It was technically trespassing to be inside one of the warehouses, but it was just too suspicious not to scope out.
Ringo stealthily approached the room, entering the warehouse through the top. Her magical lockpick made short work of the door. But she was unprepared for what she saw next.
Blood. Pink monster blood covered the inner room. The rev of chainsaws screeched out of the door- along with a familiar voice.
"-and then you bust up Phil's casino? My good ol' pal Phil? Outstanding at cheating rich fucks out their money. Shares his profits with the community. Pillar of the community. Modern Robin Hood." Luci D. Evil's screamed over the chainsaw whirl "HIS casino? At 7am? Have you no decency?"
A monstrous squawking could be heard.
"Yeah, yeah toots. You can't feel pain. Ya respawn. Villains, monsters, and goons have amazing healthcare these days. Just dropping your damn toxin-filled corpses everywhere. Doesn't mean your organs ain't harvestable. And I know you'll remember this."
Ringo slowly closed the door. She didn't need to see this.
"Plus I think your employer gonna be singing a different tune once I start selling your bits to your competitors. They won't even wanna send you in at 7am! Imagine that. We'll all get our beauty sleep again! Now now NOW!- scream once again for mommy and the audience!"
The door was shut. Ringo didn't have the energy for this. Somehow the room muffled nearly all the noise.
Villain known as Early Bird preoccupied with losing organs in the industrial district. Ringo clocking out.
Report done. Ringo wanted nothing more than to return to bed.