having one of those days where I've been able to get things done, but I feel like I'm having to very carefully meter out my spoons for them. might call out from DBT tonight and treat myself to a little bit of Doing Nothing? feels like it might be the preferable option this week tbh
it certainly does not help that my shitty abusive ex has been on my mind a lot since we finished processing my childhood trauma in EMDR last week lol. I just can't tell how much of it is my brain exploring the overall trauma experience within a safe environment vs how much of it is my internal process going "okay we finished the first part, now let's hurry up and get on to the next bit. chop chop bitch, do it Now; I'm sick of suffering" (but like lmao, I can only go so fast on that and do so much at a time, so)
it is funny how used to the EMDR routine my brain has gotten at this point. even though I don't have it this week (therapist is out of town), I can feel my body gearing itself up for resilience mode. I do think it'll be a good idea to take it easy today.