so long, and thanks for all the fish

me: man it's so unfair that I can't eat Hershey kisses anymore. where the fuck am I going to source my chocolate cravings from now

my brain: god, right? hey you can still eat brownies though

me: yeah but I would have to make brownies to have some tonight

my brain: yeah but consider, brownies are like one of the easiest things you can make right now and they'll be ready to eat in like an hour or so

me:

my brain: so are we making brownies or what

me, already collecting ingredients: yeah shit I guess we're making 9pm brownies. twist my arm, why don't you

(I hemmed and hawed over the "how are others so good at talking" one for a while because I do have a lot of words and they're very good words, but tbh concepts get mangled on the way from my brain to my mouth so often that I'd be doing myself a disservice not to mark it)

me at the poly event: wow this is so cool; I am socializing; these people seem very neat and I would like to be their friend

someone else at the poly event during a story: yeah I hope that the person who cheated on me suffers [incredibly specific violent and horrifically ableist thing to wish upon somebody, in the exact manner that one of my abusive exes might have said]

me: (out loud) ehhhh

me: (in my head) Wow!! absolutely None of that was necessary to say!! maybe I don't need to be that person's friend on second thought!!!!

the nice thing is that as we were walking to our car, I brought up how fucked up that was and my partner was like "UH YEAH it fucking reminded me of [abusive ex]" and I was like OKAY THANK FUCK I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE

me at the poly event: wow this is so cool; I am socializing; these people seem very neat and I would like to be their friend

someone else at the poly event during a story: yeah I hope that the person who cheated on me suffers [incredibly specific violent and horrifically ableist thing to wish upon somebody, in the exact manner that one of my abusive exes might have said]

me: (out loud) ehhhh

me: (in my head) Wow!! absolutely None of that was necessary to say!! maybe I don't need to be that person's friend on second thought!!!!