I did it! I reached 500 followers on Twitch. 500 followers was my goal for the year. It's the only goal for my streams that was out of my control. I'm so happy I've reached it that I don't really know how to properly celebrate it. I'm excited, proud and... a little disappointed in myself.
Focusing on social media numbers is bad. And that's exactly what I've done over the last month. 500 followers is a milestone. It's a big, round, shiny number and I was hungry for it. The last month has been my slowest month for follows ever, and I felt that so hard. I had some stupid thoughts that I was failing as a streamer or I wasn't entertaining, self-doubt really plagued me.
I started pushing for the goal, practically begging. I brought it up on stream as a joke, how close I was, how only a few people could get me to it, and I feel kinda gross about each of them now that I've gotten there. Hell, I felt bad about those jokes as I said them.
This isn't a self-flagellating post, I just wanted to put into words how I've felt the last few weeks. I don't wanna do this again. I don't wanna beg and joke and stress about my follower count.
I just wanna have a good time, ya know?
Thank you for 500 followers. I appreciate every one of you so much. It's so cool to see new usernames pop up in my chat or on the alertbox. I love hearing where people come from and what they like. Forming this community has been incredible.
Thank you to all my friends who appear on my stream. They're really nothing without you.
Ah, I'm so happy :) I love streaming. I love my friends. I love my followers. Thank you.