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I bet it would feel so good to get vaporized

no more thoughts, just particles drifting in the wind

in 7th grade I had a science teacher named Priscilla Barnes (on the first day of class she shrieked because she'd never had a Priscilla as a student before, and said I'd get an A by default; my abilities in chemistry challenged this later in the school year, however) and I vividly remember one time in class she was telling us how atom bombs work and she suddenly said, "if I could choose how to die, I'd die by atomic bomb, just vaporized, one instant here and gone the next, no pain, no time to register the fact that I'm going to die" and then went back to talking in her bubbly science teacher voice

my beautiful boy. he was only two. we have no idea what happened, a siezure is my only guess. he died in my arms.

we're in shock. kevin took him to the vet and handled everything for me.

my sweet boy.

guhhh an older relative i havent seen in 5 years is in the hospital. she's always been the sweetest. i inherited her vintage heels from her time working in offices because i was the only one who had the same shoe size (i wish i had them here in mtl) and i always loved visiting her and staying in her lovely little house growing up. i really hope she pulls through so i can see her when i visit home for the first time since 2018 later this month

she's gone. 3 days before i could be there. i'm glad she's not in pain now, and i know she probably wouldn't have been able to remember who i am because of the dementia, but i'm still sad.