and in the morning in the wake of that I can realize that strength training is a really good way to put something meaningful and lasting into your body especially if all that's in there is echoes of trauma

VOLUME FOR ALTERNATE PUSH DAY

bench press
set 1: 5 @ empty bar
set 2: 5 @ 55
set 3: 5 @ 65
set 4: 5 @ 75
set 5: bonus actual working weight set 5 @ 85 (RPE 7, 7.5?)

larsen press 2 x 10 @ 65

arnold press 3 x 10 @ 20

a-b superset
a. cable pec press-around 2 x 12 @ 50
b. pec stretch 2 x 30s

cross-body cable y-raise 3 x 20 @ 20

a-b superset
a. squeeze-only tricep pressdown 3 x 8 @ 30
b. stretch-only overhead extension 3 x 8 @ 30

cross-body tricep cable extension 2 x 12 @ 25