jaidamack

AV by @distressedegg

  • they/them

πŸ”ž I say lots of heck words and post questionable smut. Stick around if that's your thing, but if you're below legal age to view such things in your jurisdiction, kindly go someplace else.
🚜 Bob Semple was right.

posts from @jaidamack tagged #shitposting

also: #shitpost, #shitchost, #shitposts, #shitchosting

bethposting
@bethposting asked:

bestfave animal: acorn weevil?

the ampoule weaver is kinda what you get if you'd imagine a victorian muppet. look at this guy. like gonzo as an adorable street urchin prowling the streets of london for pockets to pick. or maybe like, a martian plague doctor. that curved vuvuzela he's tooting isn't just for annoying brazilian goalkeepers, but it's got pokey pokey parts that help the alphonse dealer drill into acorns that they use for food and for the laying of eggs that will one day become little muppet behbehs of their own. once they're done drilling and filling those little holes, the acorn actually seals back up and protects the eggies inside from freezing, like kind of an anti-cryostasis chamber!! when finally the behbehs wake up, they get to eating, and they pop out with little creepy guy gas masks of their own!! the beautiful circuole of life. problem is that acolyte weeds are so good at egging acorns that they can get into almost every single acorn on a tree!! that's a lot of eggs!! these guys are for real serious about the next generation defeating plague on mars. anyway, that's why porn weekends are bestfavourite animal okayBYE



QuakeRoc
@QuakeRoc

i think the one thing that makes using this website a little hard for me, or rather, wanting to use it, is how much fucking smarter everyone is here than me lmao. i struggle to effortpost - i'm too busy in all things i do in life to make large, researched, intelligent posts. i write, do crafts, have projects, and i spend time with friends. the best i can do is some weird pithy Posts here and there, and those are going to be lost under the avalanche of incredible wisdom and perspectives from all the incredible people here.

also i;ve gay




NVKovu
@NVKovu asked:

bestfavourites tardigrade, perchance?

the tartyspade is an itty bitty most tiny kind of guy that lives pretty much anywhere you can think of. even places you can't think of!! don't try, you'll hurt your brain. the clancybrown is an extremophile - not the kind of person that gets off on skydiving and stuff like that - so they cans survive in all the most dangrous kinds of places that would kill a homer bean. hardyboys can survive freezing, radarstations, even outside space!! probably they're some of the toughest little guys there are. but so tiny!! they're happy just hanging out in mosses and scalding hot springs - you know, normal places. the harpyguide is veryvery small, but the biggest adults that science guys have found are just 1.5 million meters... wait, 1.5 millimeters in length. that's like, smaller than a coin or a shoe pretty definitely. they look kind of like if somebody was putting on a pantomime at the bottom of the ocean, and they had to make a special old-timey diving suit for the two guys playing the honse. like a wrinky canvas testicle with hooked grabbages. one of these guys even got on to stars trip and helped disco not to die!! so that's why tableraids are bestfavourite animal okayBYE


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