jaidamack

AV by @distressedegg

  • they/them

πŸ”ž I say lots of heck words and post questionable smut. Stick around if that's your thing, but if you're below legal age to view such things in your jurisdiction, kindly go someplace else.
🚜 Bob Semple was right.

posts from @jaidamack tagged #shitposting

also: #shitpost, #shitchost, #shitposts, #shitchosting

selnyam
@selnyam asked:

Favourite animal: sugar gliders?

the shopping guillermo is a really little guy that nature cooks up when it's got some of the smaller spare parts from a postman left over. these guys is got the scrabbly grabbages to help them climb and hold their food up to their itty bitty faces all cutesy like. they like sweet things!! that's why they're called shoguns. the thing that shoulder glimmers is best known for is that they can catch wicked air and glitch from tree to tree across some crazy distances!! their little arms and legs have flappy flappy skin parts that are still connected to their body, so it makes a kind of wing shape when they do their superman thing. imagine if you glued yourself into a snuggie and jumped off a building on a windy day. that is how the showoff glitter do. except they don't make a wily company hole in the ground when they land like you would. so don't do that. anyway, that's why shakey gilberts are bestfavourite animal okayBYE



BrendaPrrfler
@BrendaPrrfler asked:

Okay, I HAVE to ask: But have you done the cougar (aka, da poom) as a bestfavorite animal contender yet? =>.>=;;;

the culottes is a kind of animal you might see when the common house gato gets on the protein and into crossfit. for real you see them from far away you might think a coulomb is an ordinary guy but then!! they comes up close and don't stop getting bigger. that's probly how they surprise their prey. the calhoun is called a 'generalist hypercarnivore' and yeah that's as scary as it sounds if you're made of meat!! if you're reading this there's at least maybe a twenty percent chance you're meat. watch out!! canterburys aren't classed as true big cats 'cause they can't roar, but if somebody this big was purring at me i'd be pretty nervous anyway - that face can definitely monch down on like, a bowling ball, maybe two cars. a coupe can also be called a pooper, a mountain linus, a catastrophe, or a painter. computers hold a guineas world record for having the most number of names that people call them because they're one of the most widely spread mammals on the planet dirt!! they can live pretty much anywhere, maybe even in a hole. now that's pretty cool. anyway, that's why cousteaus are bestfavourite animal okayBYE



Moo
@Moo asked:

Bestfavorite animal guinea pig?

yeah it's been a while!! so it's important today's bestfavourites animal is a good one. you know those little furry guys on start wrek, the troubles?? well a gundam pooch is basically a one of those but more scared of everything. the guido pigeon is a little guy whose job is to be a walking chicken nugget for the bigger animals, and he's kinda never gotten over that. german porks are mostly fluffy types, but you can also get the nakey nakey versions if you're into that. the gordon packers have real serious little gentleman faces like they'd stand around maps trying to stop napoleon. they like vegtatibles a whole bunch, they'll do like anything you say if you've got a carrot or a kind of leaf in your hand when you say it. just don't cast a shadow or nothing, or be taller than them, or make them look up at you because then they're gonna think you're a byeurd of prey looking for the next part of a happy meal. anyway that's why goofy petes are bestfavourite animal okayBYE


Β