Is this you?
- "I don't need to log on every day"
- "Scrolling through an endless list of new and exciting posts doesn't interest me"
- "I'd rather go outside and be among nature than post online"
Then pretty soon, you can expect to see posts like these:
Every year, an unquantifiable number of people experience Sudden Ontological Failure as a direct result of Not Logging On And Viewing Posts. With 90% of reality now taking place in cyberspace, you must View Posts for at least four (4) hours a day to ensure your meat body remains stable.
Don't be a statistic: Don't Not Log On. Your life may depend on it.
