
Hey, you, who's reading this in the future: you can find out who I am today at https://rarf.zone/about/. ๐
This tracks I think because statistically vanilla people haven't thought too hard about what they're into so they also haven't thought too hard about sexual ethics and stuff
Whereas kink community spaces have created a culture of active consent education, scene negotiation, party etiquette, etc plus the whole "safe sane consensual" thing. In order to be kinky you have to have introspected enough to recognize the kink and decide to try and find like-minded people to do it with. And you KNOW that the world at large will see you as creepy for your interests so you're going to be cagey about who you reveal it too or in what spaces.
That said having done community work in keeping kink spaces safe, there are a lot of creeps and predators in BDSM spaces who definitely haven't done much introspection and don't seem to care about consent. The culture in BDSM spaces cares more than the culture at large but there's still a lot a lot a lot of problem people.
Statistically there's just more vanilla people at the end of the day and vanilla people tend to be cishets who buy into traditional hetereopatriarchal norms where consent isn't even a thing to consider. There will be more creeps
Basically, yeah! And I've found that when you get into "lmao how could you even approximate this IRL" kinks, the same kind of line extrapolates really well. Back when I was a teenager, basically all of the (relatively few) adults who seemed to me approaching me in a dangerous manner were, like, definitely "kinky", but not in the "good luck doing this outside of RP" sense.
Yeah this absolutely makes sense with my experiences of โlessโ to โmoreโ kinky communities.
Feet, being among them (speaking of Pedestrian) feels like the obvious one to joke about but it is reliably one of the places where I have seen reasonably โvanillaโ people be the most creepy. I am sure this experience differs from person to person, though, like all but guaranteed, folks have seen Worst Possible Behavior in one kink or another, and that becomes their metric.