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hollygramazio
@hollygramazio

Current reading: this wikipedia page about Café Europa, a "cultural initiative of the Austrian presidency of the European Union", in which every EU member nation brought a nationally beloved cake to an international cake celebration.

The thing is, if a beloved cake or biscuit tastes good to naïve tastebuds then a lot of the time it stops being a national delicacy and becomes an international delicacy. The Café Europa list is therefore a list of cakes that taste good if you grew up with them. You know the sort of thing:

  • This yeasted delicacy comprises layers of a chewy dough made from flour and water, alternating with a paste of apple seeds.
  • This wafer, immersed in water until damp, is shaped around a sphere of pink cream and then hardened in the sun.
  • This light biscuit is formed from the whites of forty eggs mixed with however much sugar you require to give you a headache, spooned into conical cases and baked until dry.

See for example the Netherlands' contribution of the tompouce, a pastry whose own wikipedia page has an extended section titled "eating the tompouce", a process which it describes as "difficult and messy".

The outsider-hostile cake is, to be clear, a really outstanding category of cake. I've talked on cohost before about the lamington, Australia's inevitable contribution to a hypothetical global cake buffet: a cube of dry sponge covered on all six sides with slightly chocolatey frosting and then covered again in desiccated coconut, or possibly paper shavings, it's not always possible to tell from taste alone. It is extremely delicious to me. I just love the idea of a huge buffet of cakes surrounded by milling ambassadors, each of whom is required by politeness to avoid the cake they brought and love and instead to eat a confusing and slightly unpleasant cake provided by their neighbour.


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in reply to @hollygramazio's post:

I reckon ideally the UK would have gone with one of its slightly unpleasant "layer of marzipan" cakes: Simnel cake, battenberg, bakewell tart:

That said, shortbread fulfils the brief I reckon - it's kind-of difficult to eat, that dry powdery mouthful.

Ireland has the "scone" as its cake. A fresh scone with cream, butter and jam can pretty amazing but its core its flour, water & baking soda, aka the literal bare minimum to make something that would be considered a baked good. I guess when you've got England in your shit all the time and don't have the stolen wealth and trade-goods of various far-off colonies , you get the scone as your national cake.

I have never had Chicago's own Atomic Cake, which is a five layer cake where every layer is different (includes banana) and I think custard is involved and icing and probably more stuff, (follows the same ok but what if there was more? principle as the pizza). Could you have a utopia where instead of wars & economics you had extremely serious cultural standoffs (but only about things that kind of don't actually matter (cake, going to the moon, etc) ?

Going to counter your casual claiming of the lamington with my proposal for NZ. The Pavlova. Is impossible to buy pre-made because it can't be preserved, but also is really hard to bake at home. It's almost always cracked, sunken, etc, and we've all agreed to enjoy it anyway because it's an excuse to eat fruit and cream.

Yes, absolutely perfect. The way it always looks messy even when made by professionals. The fact that it is objectively slightly less nice than just eating the fruit and cream on its own would be. The fact that you literally can't make it if it's too humid!! Very happy to relinquish all claims to the pavlova to NZ and I look forward to someone bringing one on the long flight to the international cake buffet, broken down into its component parts to assemble at the far end, hoping the misshapen meringue base doesn't shatter in the luggage racks.