if my cat had a chost it would all be stuff like ":( wintyr won't let me eat their hair" and "found a good sunbeam to nap in" and "wintyr is casting the spell of no pats: peeling orange"
if my dog had a chost it would all be stuff like "guess who's the goodest girl on the block? yeah. it's me. #humblebrag" and "so sad kids these days don't get to experience their people playing with them without a smartphone" and "hmmm. i got fed 30 minutes ago. where's my second lunch?!"