FaeWife Era 🔞

Sebastian: This is model I use when I'm writing something to personal for a character (a.k.a I'm chatting an unfeasible amount of shit)

Writing about computer games has always been a passion of mine, growing up I hardly knew anyone who was into games so most of my time exploring them any deep came from, well myself. Staring bug eyed at the ceiling of at the age of 5 in my old bedroom brainstorming ‘what if Klobber from Donkey Kong Country 2 hid in a checkpoint barrel?’ To age 16 trying to process the ending of Persona 3 four months after my mother passed away. I had to take a degree exploring the literary canon if I ever felt like I wanted to put this passion to deconstruct and analyse art to any practical use. It’s honestly taken a while to find the time and battle the imposter syndrome, along with a general writing as autisticly as possible at all times

So hey: I'm Autistic right? (I mean everyone writing for this is) And my hyperfocus is Capcom. Just a general anything adjacent to it. The games, the music the art, all of that stuff. I still remember the early days of the internet just intently studying webpages of Marvel vs. sprites. Some kids played five aside in their early teens, I rewatched the same Marvel 2 Combo music video of the song from Scorpian King for 7 hours.

So I want to write about Vulgus, Capcom's very first arcade game they put out. A 1984 endless vertical shooter, something that feels miles away yet undeniably on the same path as the company that would release the arcade hits we all associate with the brand. Then afterwards someday I'd love to write about every Capcom game ever made ever. I need to. I need to fill in my letterbox, I need to document every song I've heard. I need irrefutable proof of the time I spent on this earth. It's not enough to simply enjoy something, it has to contribute towards a some kind of work. It's the completely healthy way to consume media we've all internalised!

So what can you write about Vulgus? A very ‘Over in 5 minutes’ arcade SHMUP from the mid 80’s which stands out like a pebble in a river amongst a sea of Space Shooters of the time. I could go into the history such as it being Capcom’s first game, or it’s sequels, the Yashichi and it’s appearance in future Capcom titles, or it’s freeware IBM port? But also what’s the point? If you’ve clicked on an article titled Vulgus then you know. You know what it is, you know what it’s like, you know the Power Stone final boss is named after it, like you know. So why repeat what you already know and is well documented? Maybe you’re here for a revolutionary transformative opinion like “It’s fun for a bit.”

But when wanting to talk about something for the sake of talking about what DO you even talk about? Well actually there is something I'm obsessed with: The spaceship you play as:

Look at that thing! Compared to contemporaries like Xervious, he's so chonky! That's right, both Spherical and a vessel that goes by He/Him. That's what he is. Sub optimal play because I'm thinking of squishing him between my thumb and index finger like a marshmallow the entire time.

I also love the aspects that are such a tell of when it was made. The big enemy ships being modelled after insects, but not an abstract graphic to derive your own meaning from, ala. Galaga. No it is a literal giant metal ship, shaped like a wasp. Almost as if engaging in conversation with the audience like "Well that's what they have to be in all them other games right!? But isn't that silly?" Super cute.

I also really much like despite being an infinitely scrolling game, there is a cute subtle tell about when you were beginning a new loop: A little "Capcom" is drawn in the sand of the terrain below.

Well... That was some words about a game alright! While writing this I gotta wonder if these little observations are The Entire Point tho? I know voicing anything about the art you love may seem fruitless in a sea of criticism that has been streamlined into a content machine. Filled with endless hours of a guy looking into a camera and letting you know Marianne 2 was released in Japan as Doki Doki Heart Failure for disc.

But this lens of it is so needlessly harsh on us, as people living through the roaring 20's redux y'know? Did William Wordsworth walk into the forest and go "Everyone's heard of trees, my voice adds nothing to the dialogue." Or did he go "Grass slaps my dude, the people have gotta know."

And when so much of our time is spent playing these games, watching these movies and listening to these songs. Is it really so... Bizarre that these are the things we wish to utilize to express ourselves? I really want you to know how much I liked the chonky Vulgus ship and that's really valid of me and makes me exactly like Percy Bysshe Shelley if you think about it.

All we can do is exist, in the times when we're alive. I just happen to be here now, and that's the only context where I can express myself in the ways that I can. I can't be in the 1800's going ape about a tree, or going "Cars, that's weird right?" All I got is the experience of playing Vulgus on a little android device, while the rain patters against my window in the evening, as I try and distract myself from the world collapsing and fascism rising. Maybe this will end up being the value of this text, just a record of how we coped and lived. Hey maybe that's neat enough!

The ship is roumbd, very potate'