Starting to get Blaseball vibes on here now where the sheer act of talking to people you know about literally anything you read on this site is treated as stalking or sinister, I remember Blaseball people who would act like you're spying for another team if you just...ever spoken to people on other teams. Y'all can't tell me you don't talk to people in your discords or group chats or whatever about posts on social media or go "look at what this person said" ever, I'm losing my mind at people acting like doing that is kiwifarms now. That's regular ass socializing. That's passing someone a note in class that says "did you hear what Jennifer said to Darren yesterday???"
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in reply to @lori's post:
Exactly! I honestly never paid much attention to the "meta" subculture on here until I saw people talking about osteophage and the "in defense of the humble link compilation" post, but it is kind of jarring the extent and quickness with which people attribute malicious motivations and intent to what seems like basic realities of socializing, and even things they do themselves without a second thought.
at this point, I'm increasingly feeling that I am not seeing either an entire discourse, or a major facet of one that's only barely crossing my bow, because the takes you're talking about seem so out of left field
I mean I gather it's part of the influx adjacent feature request/culture clash, or people in alarm over osteophage again?
like. I get why people would be leery, sure, especially a lot of people who remember the days of lolcows and being Posted About. and I'm sure the gal who Tumblr just nuked isn't keen about the public scrutiny and attention for example, but like. I dunno. I can't put myself in those shoes.
as far as features Cohost goes, I like a lot of Cohost as is because I'm someone that due to my mental conditions had to keep quitting other websites for the sheer amount of compulsory notifications i couldn't help but try to check (Facebook, furaffinity) so I like a lot of what's here but I also understand that there's a lot more this place needs to be useful and meaningful for others. I don't know how much stuff that is, and maybe it's less than the incoming folks believe, or more than the incumbent folks do, there's definitely a lot of us who have been asking for "see downstream content/down thread" at the very least, i think.
I just try not to get too into it anymore, I hope for the best here but I'll just keep playing it by ear.
OK I'm new so: what? Telling friends about posts you saw is Controversial? What the hell lol. I could see it if like, as a niche social media platform people might be using it as a space where they get some distance from particular friends/social groups/whatever to say stuff they might not want those people to see (not even in a bad way like I absolutely am in discords that are nice because it doesn't have my Core Social Group in the same way and I can, like, talk about crushes n shit like that lol), having that kinda container for socializing in a different way IS nice...
There is an ocean of a difference between a Discord server and a public internet page meant to be a sort of study and with the explicit intention of being spread around complete with "Explanations" baked in. I feel like you must realize this? It's also (usually) tacky for me to go on small Discord servers and gossip about the bigger one we're all in, and also (almost always) tacky for my friend to pass notes to my ex.
Also: a crucial component here is that we have asked Coyote to knock it off and we are being laughed off. How is that ever acceptable? Maybe to save someone's fucking life or something. It feels very victim blamey to say that we're the ones being unreasonable. It doesn't fucking matter. Unless it's urgent or what we're asking for is impractical, it doesn't matter if we're right or make sense or have internally consistent logic. It's social etiquette.
I really think you need to log off for a few. You're on Pillowfort fuckin screaming at everyone at this point, including people who have you blocked here (which comes off as going there deliberately to keep trying to engage with people you can't here), and despite saying that you know block evading was wrong, you are continuing to defend it and are now saying you speak for hundreds of people when you're speaking for you. You're building this up in your head as something way bigger than it is and are doing way more harm to yourself than was ever done to you by coyote's posts at this point. Step away for a while and calm down before you do something you'll regret, seriously, nothing about what you're doing in the last few hours is healthy. I know what it looks and feels like to spiral from shit happening online. You didn't get banned, be happy about that.
XKeeper responded to me first after I intentionally avoided them, IDK who Tyrian is but they were clearly talking about my comment directly above them. And yes when I say "this makes me uncomfortable" I am repeating everyone else who said the same thing. I really don't appreciate being talked down to and having my points literally completely dismissed, but it's clear you're not going to listen to me or everyone who has said what I'm saying. You suffer from a lack of empathy if you think Being Right is more important than our simple requests. It actually reminds me of the whole suicide baiting bullshit.
It's late.
For what it's worth, I don't think something making someone uncomfortable inherently means someone has to act on that. I've been in too many communities where discomfort was really abused to get one's way, so I don't buy into that idea anymore. It's okay for people to be uncomfortable or upset, but discomfort and upset alone don't mean someone's behavior has to completely cease. There has to be more. I genuinely think you're hurting right now, but I don't think that means anyone else is obligated to change what they're doing purely based on discomfort, and I don't think that justifies lashing out at everyone around you.
I can't actually figure out what harm was done to you by having your posts linked, it's very possible I missed stuff but if it was just being upset at having been linked or told your post sucked...then I don't think it's wrong for that to happen. Frankly, your post did suck. Telling other people who were uncomfortable, who were worried about the exact same vulnerabilities you're upset about right this second, that they need to get over it because Cohost doesn't have that and the mods will take care of it if it happens, was extremely dismissive of you before any of the linking happened. Your answer to "I don't know if I feel safe here" was basically "shut up it's safe here". And it's even worse when you consider, y'know, the time that Cohost actually did have a nazi here and the mods didn't ban them or take the reports seriously and then after everyone got mad about that wrote a fussy post about how everyone should have trusted them more and been nicer about them letting a nazi stay. There's actually really good precedent to not just trust the mods to take care of this.
So what is the actual source here? What was the original harm done to you? DID you get harassment from being linked there? Or did a couple of people just say "lol bad post" on Pillowfort and that upset you? Because you're completely within your rights to feel however you want about that, but that doesn't mean that anything horrible was done to you. But again, maybe there's something else that happened that I don't know. You're treating this like everyone knows what horrible thing happened, and I have yet to find that out.
- Harm: Profoundly triggering experience for me as a repeated "Twitter villain" and victim of cybergangstalking
- I'm not a baby, I don't care if people disagree with my posts, you disagree with just about everything I say and I still follow you, but I am very fucking triggered by people taking my posts as their own laughing fodder after I've specifically asked them not to
- FWIW I did have one weirdo come on my page
- My post: I really don't see how me explaining Cohost's (relatively) low abuse potential and (relatively) active moderation on-site equates to their inaction about off-site trolling
- Was not here for a Nazigate thing, if I'm correct here the person did not make any posts before being banned and Kara's philosophy is generally that people shouldn't be banned for being a douchebag in unrelated ways offsite (which I think is better than kinda going crazy but also simplistic and not proactive) but that's all I know
Your own opinions on things about the site (in this case a healthy distrust of the mod team and site) seem to blind you to other perspectives (regardless of the merits of what I said, absolutely nothing was gained from trespassing my boundaries other than sardonic kvetching from the world's smuggest humanities majors who have nothing to do with any of this, which I hope we can agree is not a favorable tradeoff)
Good night
Theres no nice way to say this but it is 100% possible for someone to be heavily triggered by someone doing nothing wrong. That isn't something anyone can account for.
The Nazi thing, you're missing too much context here. A Nazi was harassing a Jewish user on another platform and created an account here to continue that. Their report was ignored. Literally just BEING a Nazi is bannable on cohost so the behavior being off site literally didn't matter. And the staff reaction was to try to make the victim in this situation feel bad for speaking out about it because you're supposed to just blindly trust the mod team to be good people. This exact same blind trust is what you're expecting a bunch of brand new users to have, based on...nothing.
Ultimately I just can't stop seeing the hypocrisy here. Other people with safety concerns are wrong to feel that way, but your feelings trump anyone else's. Someone stomping your boundaries is sinful but you doing the same is justified. People should be punished for their behavior offsite, unless it's you.
I had Cohost users linking threads I made on fedi to say terrible shit about me. I've experienced this from the opposite end. Somehow it's only wrong and suddenly a site wide crisis if someone on a different site does it to Cohost users.