Line up at the trough, beef chiefs. I'm John Arby, King of Arby's, and today we've revolutionized the Cow-to-Mouth pipeline once again with The Tenderizer™. Don't let its loud exhaust and Ford F-150 covered in knives-ness fool you. Beeves don't stand a chance against it - one second they're turning grass into methane, then pow! We're rendering a paddock full of farts into something approximating a patty at speeds it'd kill a medieval child to witness. We're in the Renaissance of beef punishment, people. Our menus are illuminated. I'm John Arby.
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