One day @capriciousCapra will actually drop the John Arby lore on Cohost and people will finally grasp his beef (teehee) with cows.
A sorcerous bovine cursed his only son to bear the form of an oven mitt; an affront to God and man alike. Since that day, he has waged relentless war against both beefkind, and that spunkgrungling charlatan Rick Burgerking.
Not for any good reason, just. Fuck Rick Burgerking.

