I think the most annoying thing to me about DNI lists in this context is not the usual non-work of not doing anything to assert your own boundaries, but instead making other people do it for you -- but that it's about art, in a way, and you're trying to tell some people you don't want them interacting with your art. It's art. There will always be people you don't like who view your art and have experiences. (This is like, loose flowery language, but I mean 'experiences' to encompass: feelings, thoughts, associations, memories, conversations, etc etc, literally anything). And that's not something you can control. Sharing your art (online) does come at the "cost" that it is out of your hands now. You aren't just showing your one friend or family member in person. Your reach is beyond you. Whether good or bad. And to try to reel that back in and state you only want certain sorts of people or only people who think certain things about certain topics to view or interact or have generative experiences with your art? I don't think I have any words other than: Literally grow up.
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in reply to @maleviolent's post:
The thing that gets me about that kind of thing, ie. "Don't share if xyz" or "DNI if you are xyz" is like... Okay? Or what? How would you know? Especially when I see stuff that's "don't tag as kin" or "DNI if you ship such-and-such". Do you want engagement from only a certain, limited crowd? Are you afraid of people you've moralized as "bad" looking at things you make because you feel like it reflects negatively on you? Idgi!
I think it just makes people uncomfortable to be around people who believe things they don't agree with in some way (ship certain things, are kin in a way that might relate to their art, have different political beliefs) and it's okay to be uncomfortable but this is really a situation imo there's nothing you can do about that other than like, get over it. It ultimately doesn't really matter because most of the time people aren't reblogging to do anything "actually" transformative that might be either disrespectful of the original artist's wishes or lean into bullying. Which is such a fringe-case thing that it's literally a concept in my mind that I've never actually seen happen. I think I might be wording this really vaguely so more explicitly: What if someone edited art you made to make fun of you. And they happened to be someone you don't like because of the way they conduct themselves online in some way. Oh no.
No you're so right, and that's understandable and a very real fear (even if it doesn't happen as often as there is media being put out onto the World Wide Web) because people on the internet are mean this way at times. But that's an eternal risk of the medium. :T We should all be really niceys so that people don't feel scared to do stuff. But I think people should get over it too! I agree with you 1000%