warning if you look into the full lyrics for illloved by SOOOO, there are a couple intense references to s/a . but the lyrics that Don't mention that tht remind me of takahiro,
"I was born to acquire suffering
Actually, I've known that since long ago
So perhaps that's why the teachers told me too
That my smile exists to make everyone happy"
"I'm sorry I was born"
"Kindness is given with suffering as a condition
That's why I named the fear of death ‘love’
You all eagerly throw it at me
That’s why I also gladly endangered my life
It's okay
Even tomorrow,
I will keep getting hurt with a smile"
"With those gentle eyes,
The person who praised me,
What exactly do they want from me?
What will they take from me next?"
"From the miniature garden of survival
The alarm bells were ringing
"There's no such thing as definite proof in this world," they said
When I die someday, flowers will be laid upon me and I'll probably be mocked
That's why the fear of death called itself ‘love’ for me
If by my screaming, struggling, flailing, and eventually perishing,
Everyone can be happy, then that's enough for me
Please forgive me
For having such clumsy thoughts
I wish my smile would just crumble away
Please, let everyone escape from this ugliness
Since even the things that were truly precious to me
Have all been burnt to death by you,
I didn't want to be thought of as a kind person
I didn't want to be called a kind person
I didn't want to become a kind person
I didn't want to become a kind person…
I didn't want to become A KIND PERSON…"
ifeel so fuckedup