Nora Neurosismancer

Wherever you go the past always follows
and it weighs heavy on your shoulders
a geography of emotion tied up in history
far too personal to share except as poetry

Manhattan is made of your own memories
enough to trip over as you cross 6th Avenue
a hard landing in a pile of faded failures
new eyes notice how it all comes full circle

You were full of unearned confidence then
drunk on love and the newfound freedom
of reinvention that took you in all directions
from uptown to downtown and back again

The culmination of transformation occurred
at last but in deep isolation from the world
you emerged eighteen months later blinking
those new eyes a gateway to an old soul

Or perhaps it was the other way around
after all this time you're still not quite sure
how everything became so familiarly strange
let alone what you're going to do about it

Going back to the place
Where I was conceived
Where the shell began to break
Where I became me

A spiritual home
Far north from here
Where pilgrims converge each year
To perform the dance

The dance binds us
Together in bliss
One dancer will be crowned the best
As we all cheer

We want the crown
We want the victory
But there is no enmity, no rivalry
It defeats the point

We dance for peace
We dance for love
Love for each other and the world
We seek to change

My home is here
My home is there
My heart is split between them both
It does not ache

There was never a guarantee
But there was a promise at least
And someone is refusing
To hold up their end of the deal
Well it sure as fuck isn't me

I can't say I did everything right
But I fulfilled the terms of service
And whatever I was promised
I can say that this isn't it
Well this isn't it at all

In fairness the details were vague
But the numbers don't lie
And if I'm part of the first generation
To do worse than their parents
Well it isn't for lack of trying

I went to college to punch my ticket
But it sure wasn't cheap
And on the other side I found out
It costs to be austere
Well, more than it ever cost you