if i had the resouces of hollywood i would make a period piece historical fiction heist movie set in tzarist russia, about the bolsheviks robbing banks to fund their communist party (a thing they ACTUALLY DID). featuring
- elaborate stylish over the top early-1900s costumes and set pieces
- tropey convoluted oceans 11 heist plans, but in the era of early motorcars and horses!!!
- probably not even trying to be accurate to what bank robberies were like at the time cuz i bet they were actually really boring and straightforward but if my researcher found out that actually they were cool, we would do that. yeah definitely!!
- an anakin skywalker-esque young stalin, who has no idea he's going to go on to be a horrible authoritarian tyrant and traitor to socialism, and is still just a idealistic kid with dreams of freeing the people. (bank robberies to fund the communist party was what stalin did before the revolution!! look it up)
- less ominous socialists who dont go on to be terrible!!!
- can you IMAGINE the cool police chase scenes thru st petersburg?? can you PICTURE the fuckin fights with old timey pre-wwi weaponry???
- leftists doing discourse in the fuckin early 20th century!!!!!!!!! fuckin POLITICAL DRAMA. make it TOPICAL to CURRENT DEBATES.
- homages and references to EARLY SOVIET CINEMA!!! fuckin get some battleship potemkin refs in there!! make the credits sequence at the start echo "man with a movie camera"!! fuckin, sergei eisenstein hell yea!!
i just think if a socialist heist movie set in tzarist russia existed, that would be fucking SICK
(if i actually had the resources of hollywood i would probably actually spend them on better things than making a movie. but still.)
patrick stewart is probably too old to reprise his role as lenin, but