• she/her

healthcare bureaucrat in philly, v adhd, orthodox jew, ect ect, im love my wife



dreadwedge
@dreadwedge

You can only wish you could be so succulent and delicious as a ripe ear of corn. You wish you had the depth of flavor, that you had so many glistening, perfect kernels of yourself. You want to be shucked. No. You need to be shucked. Say it. Yet you have no delicate, silky husk to shed, no vegetal armor to be ripped vigorously from your body, and were I to humor you and taste your insipid flesh, it would go down smooth, like green beans boiled to bland mush. Oh, but you fancy yourself a force of nature, a quarrelsome sparring partner, a thorny stalk standing high in the blistering sun. You imagine you would stick between my teeth, pierce my flesh, linger in my memory and at my gumline for days after the fact. Ha! You have no backbone, no conviction, no cob. I would not need even to chew, let alone cut. A brace-toothed juvenile could swallow you whole, for you present nothing to brace for. You are unfit to be boiled down for syrup. You are not corn. You will never be corn. You will never know half of what it takes to be even baby corn. If you must call yourself corn, then let it be known you are the soft shell in the bottom of a days old microwavable paper bag, too timid and vacuous to to make a sound. You have nothing to express, and no amount of salt or butter can hide it. Motherfucker


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in reply to @dreadwedge's post:

[1:08 PM]ayy: does she... wanna fuck that corn?

[1:08 PM]bee: She's saying you're not worthy to fuck that corn

[1:09 PM]ayy: do... I wanna fuck that corn?

[1:10 PM]bee: Obviously

[1:11 PM]ayy: SHUCK ME

[1:16 PM]bee: Weird way to say peel back the foreskin but okay

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