onnes

Furry Physicist and Lead Engineer

  • they/she

Avatar by @stratica
NSFW: @darkonnes


junkmail
@junkmail

Brainfuck

Pros:

  • You get to say "fuck" in a vaguely technical context
  • Elegantly minimalist syntax
  • Truly deranged control flow and memory management makes comprehending code a nightmare (fun)
  • a masterclass in doing a lot with very little

Cons:

  • Saying Brainfuck is the best esolang is like saying that the beatles are the best rock band of all time: It's a defensible opinion, and it might even be true, but it's also the least interesting thing you could have added to the conversation

Untyped Lambda Calculus

Pros:

  • Actually writing anything resembling a real program is probably harder in this than any other programming language
  • "Oh? 3? You mean λf. λx. f(f(f(x)))?" statements dreamed up by the utterly deranged
  • Not having types when a type system is the lowest hanging fruit imaginable is the kind of thing only a real gamer can pull off

Cons:

  • Far too important to the history of logic and computing to be a genuine waste of your time

Befunge

Pros:

  • Near-impossible to write a compiler for
  • Self-modification and geometry are the kinds of things you only add to a programming language if you are truly deranged
  • You will never get the word "fungeoid" out of your head

Cons:

  • Lacks the gamercred of later fungeoids

Whitespace

Pros:

Cons:


C

Pros:

  • Theoretically powerful but without guardrails for sanity, like god intended
  • Near impossible to write secure, performant code in
  • Type system/pointer math is the kind of thing only cooked up by deranged mathematicians
  • I, the dark wizard malloc, will cast you into the void star

Cons:

  • Somehow still industry standard

You must log in to comment.

in reply to @junkmail's post:

lambda calculus is sooo fun though. like, properly understanding church numerals, booleans, lists, and more advanced stuff like recursion via y combinator or turing completeness is just. sooooo cool. i love lambda calculus