eating is such a chore sometimes, why can't I just photosynthesize

Skip. 30. Gay ace mute dude with fists for hands. I love orcs and I love punching. I have the stiff, lethargic body language of a neanderthal who hasn't thawed yet. I drive a 2003 Ford Tulpa. I can neither see nor hear Tom Hanks. Castaway was a very confusing film for me as I'm sure you can imagine.
eating is such a chore sometimes, why can't I just photosynthesize