I am currently downloading shady torrents of supposedly cracked dll files so I can install Office 2007 on my Thinkpad. Objectively the best looking Office ever made. Best boy deserves more recognition. Rechost if you appreciate Office 2007.
Update: it worked. But in a fascinating way.
Most software cracks for earlier versions of Office constitute a simple "drag this dll here to replace the old one, there, it's cracked." But 2007 was one of the early models to implement online activation, so the process got a little funky.
First, you've got to find any old product key for your version of Office 2007 online, because otherwise the setup program won't even let you install it. However, the setup program will also instantly check any product key you give it with Microsoft's servers, given the chance. So you need to take away that chance, and disable your internet connection before putting in the product key, so that Office can't confirm the key's current state with any outside resource, it just has to assume it's still a valid key and let you progress - kind of like what Windows does at install.
And just like Windows, this puts the software in a pseudo-activated state. Activation superposition. Schrodinger's activation. It gives you 2 options for activating your install in the 30-day time limit before the bomb Microsoft has put in your home goes off. One option is to join the 21st century and connect to the internet. The other is to be your grandpa and activate over the phone.
Keeping your internet off, you replace the appropriate dll file. It's just one. Then, opening any Office app and navigating to the Activate by Telephone screen, you select your country - in my case United States, and then fill all the boxes with 0's. Your screen looks like 0000-0000-0000-0000-0000, it's hilarious, and made even more funny by the warning dialogue below the country selection telling you Activation by Telephone is no longer supported for the United States. Despite this, you click Activate, and it works perfectly. And continues to work after installing every update. It's a very clever workaround, jacking into the short-lived telephone activation mechanism. I wonder why Microsoft doesn't support that anymore...