the most positive feeling I get about my gender on a regular basis honestly isn't euphoria - I got that at first but at this point my hedonic treadmill has kinda caught up - but escape.
there's such a big ugly powerful system that says your body determines who you're allowed to be but they couldn't catch me! I got away!
and in the face of this feeling every worry I have about being a Real Man (as if that's a thing) melts away because I didn't get away from one trap just to bumble into the other god dammit. Big Gender can't take me back noway nohow! I'm on my own now and I'm never going back!
