As much as I want my work to be recognized and appreciated by others I am so glad I am not famous and most likely never will be, even a minor internet sort of way. Especially since leaving Twitter I essentially never get harassed anymore online, and any sort of feelings of inferiority or like I don't stand out enough are far, far outweighted by that.
I don't know, I guess also having friends here and there who are big names in certain communities or have gotten the attention of the entire internet for a day has made me weary. There's this heightened reality fame creates, especially online, where things wildly distort in proportion and actual perspective goes out the window. Getting a massive following changes people, either they become extreme burnouts or they start intoxicating themselves on the hype around them. It drove a wedge into one of my previous relationships, where "S" the artist and "H" the human being that I loved so dearly felt like different people entirely.
And on the internet, it's not like money comes along with fame, either. Plenty of people joke about "wealthy furries in tech" and things like that but not a great deal of them are producing any sort of culture, they're just bankrolling it. Considering how many layoffs in tech there have been over the past few years that pool is constantly shrinking anyway. Being seen/known and being financially solvent are two different things.
I don't know, every time I think I want to be more well known I see someone else who is too engaged to log off and needs to just go sit outside for a while. I am terrified I would become exactly like them.