there's a few, but they mostly boil down to a lack of respect. not agreeing on a scene or kinks beforehand is a big one, as well as things like men coming up to me at kink parties and just grabbing me without asking or even introducing themselves. disrespect can be hot as part of a dynamic, but
i guess the other thing apart from that is boring/non-kinky sex. i've never really been able to completely get horny for vanilla stuff, and if the top doesn't even seem to be enjoying themselves its even worse.