i'm hot and sexy and everyone loves me
#Hypershock
(Intro)-(Pt. 1)-(Pt. 2)-(Pt. 3)-(Pt. 4)-(Pt. 5)-(Pt. 6)-(Pt. 7)-(Final Awards)
HUGE
Well, they're still huge. This is your third year where you've looked exactly the same; I still love the eyes on the hat, but like... you gotta do something more at this point. Stagnation is death, and i'm not super into your shirts. 3.8/10.
Thoughts from the Reviewers
Grace: I was mourning the loss of Big Dill’s bucket hat from last year, but we have one here, at least. That’s about the only thing worth writing home about here.
Iris: Well, at least none of them are wearing shorts, I guess. I feel like teams these days need to consider merchandising potential when working up t-shirts; these do not scream fan must-haves.
HYDRA
I have nothing to say here that I wouldn't say for Fusion, so instead i'll say that if Jake wants to play the villain, he's gotta step it up a bit. Hydra is a scary bot, do something spooky to go with it! Tombstone has it's own robot just to carry it to the field, you gotta get on that level. 4/10.
Thoughts from the Reviewers A Brief Aside
I lost our thoughts on this one, so instead I'm gonna say I wrote almost all of this up while doing a 6 hour stretch of phone calls trying to find out what it meant that I was "too poor to get help with health insurance". Unfortunately, they're going to make me pay almost 400 dollars for entering my income wrong, because if you're poor you can go get fucked. If you've enjoyed this thread and you'd like to help a broke trans woman pay bills this month, here's my PayPal link, any donation helps. Thanks a ton. <3
HYPERSHOCK
Ya look good! I like the white jackets more then last year's brown, and the bot looks incredible as always. And hey, holding up your many prizes will always be a solid thing to do in an image, even if I'll always prefer the poses of yesteryear. 8.1/10
Thoughts from the Reviewers
Grace: It’s good! Not great, but, like, good. I think it’s cute that it says “get shocked” in cursive by the zipper. I kinda thought those were lab coats at first glance, so that’s a theme for someone else.
Kate: It’s nice they always try something new! I like these more than the brown jackets, although I wish we got a better look at the t shirt underneath.
June: Pfft, you just want to know what the merch you'll be buying this year looks like cause you're hypershock's number one fan.
JACKPOT
When a bot absolutely nails it in one year, I wonder how they'll handle next year, when their aesthetic is no longer Fresh. Jackpot decided to make a funny hat, and you know what? It's perfect. I have to take a tiny bit off for coordination, but still, an incredible 9.7/10
Thoughts from the Reviewers
Grace: Always a fan of the casino theming. Love the lady in the tiny hat and the sequined tailcoat. The lady on the back right's rolled up sleeves look like the bruiser that’ll break my legs if I get caught counting cards, and I absolutely love that.
Iris: I can't believe they got Lady Luck herself on the team! This rules. Perfect balance of "costume" and "comfortable t-shirt and jeans".
KRAKEN
It is GOOD to see Kraken back on top. They understand that the correct answer to "we brought a huge number of people to the photoshoot" is "and we put them ALL in costume". And the costumes are great! Kraken always tries everything they can, and I'm glad to say it works. 10/10
Thoughts from the Reviewers
Grace: They got the dread pirate Roberts! Two giant wrenches! That man waxed his mustache for this! A++!
Iris: This gang of people COULD pilot a 16th century galleon. I fully believe it. Kraken always comes hard with the theming, and this feels like a triumphant comeback after the pandemic years. Not every team outfit needs to match to coordinate!
Kate: This is a team that always commits and it’s absolutely wonderful. This screams ensemble pirate comedy show at a ren fair, what more could we ask for?
LOCK-JAW
Another entry in the "you did nothing" category. I appreciate the collared shirts, but at this point you're seemingly just content to rest on reputation. Which is fine! Nobody is gonna be bothered by you reusing a costume... except us. 4/10
Thoughts from the Reviewers
Grace: Same as it ever was!
Kate: Good colors at least?
LUCKY
his one shook me, because I didn't think Lucky needed an upgrade. I liked last year's jumpsuits! And yet, not only did they try something new, they did something GREAT. Love the hockey theme, and I'm not sure why you chose to dress up the dog but I adore it. 8.2/10.
Thoughts from the Reviewers
Grace: Lady wearing fishnets with the hockey jersey: I respect you. Also, does that guy’s hat say “WOO” on it?
Iris: THEY DRESSED UP THE DOG. Loving the hockey jerseys with the 2000s webcomic ass logo.
June: I guess they super embraced the "We're from Canada" thing, which is funny to me because their Fun Fact talks about how they're an international collaboration.
MADCATTER
MaDCatTer has their aesthetic nailed, and so it seems they put their time into a truly psychedelic paint job on their bot. I'm into it! The pants all match, they're all doing the hell out of the pose, even the helmet guy returned! 8.5/10
Thoughts from the Reviewers
Kate: Points for having the group photo on theme. Nice coordination with the dark pants, I like the added patches.
Iris: Not much fashion here, this team has A Bit and they commit to The Bit, but that's fine-- it's the only way I'll ever approve of the blue denim button-ups so many of these folks seem to love. Flat Cap Guy is just vibing.
June: Yeah, it's great that since everyone is posing we get to see everyone's takes on the Martin Mason Pose. You've got flat cap guy who looks more curious then anything, the guy in the far back who looks like he just noticed your terrible 2/10 outfit, it's fun as hell.