partially because writing documentation is actually somewhat Zen™ for me, but also because I get to write shit like

"obviously disastrous and unpredictable consequences [...] wholly inadvisable [...] under absolutely no circumstances whatsoever [...] will mysteriously fail or trigger seemingly random and nigh-untraceable segmentation faults [...] massive, potentially enterprise-scale (whatever that means to you) memory corruption [...] all of which can, fortunately, be trivially avoided by not trying to be too clever. [...] certain death."