I've been putting this one off because it is just... painful to talk about. I hate this computer. I really, really do. It is an unredeemable piece of shit. There is no reason for it to exist. It does nothing correctly... and then new information came to light. And this information contains the one actual thing it did right. This was planned to be the launch of the series here on Cohost, but Microcode and the Itanium were far more enjoyable to write about.

But it's time. I've put this off long enough. It's time to talk about...
...you.