March lasted like 3 years but May has been like 2 days long. How are we halfway through it already what the hell

For the last half a year i've been casually telling everyone I know "Oh, I'm 25", just because it's a much easier age to remember than 24 is. The problem with that is that i've driven it through my head that I am actually 25 and not 24, and actually this wednesday will be my 26th birthday. I think I've achieved the peak Mid-Twenties Sludge

I think this may have been the longest "wednesday" of the year. The rumor mill is reporting that it has lasted a solid six weeks or so