This post has content warnings for: Violence.
#an-94
what is a cool looking, but impractical firearm that you like? my current one is the zip 22, it's absolutely cool looking imo, but even the act of holding it is an uncomfortable mess and it sucks major ass.
and the inverse too, what's a boring looking but totally practical firearm that you like? mine is probably the browning hi-power
First of all, I respect the choices; the Zip 22 is cool in its uncoolness. It's a hilarious disaster it exists at all! And I always have plenty of love for a good old Hi-Power.
So, to answer your questions proper:
Cool but impractical: AN-94
I could have answered the H&K G11 and talked at length about the literal precise clockwork that makes up the internal mechanism, but that wouldn't be fair - I don't think the G11 is necessarily impractical, just extremely complex and German.
But no, I'll go with the AN-94. It is really cool because of its 2-round burst mode that can reach about 1800 RPM, feeling so fast it feels vaguely like a single shot, when you actually fired two.
It is REALLY impractical for basically everything else. The internal mechanism is a nightmare that involves a pulley and a sub-receiver, and based on the limited information I have of people who actually fired it, it's not particularly reliable either.
It's a cool gun that sacrifices two of the things that made the AK-74 worthwhile (reliability and ease of servicing) in favor of its one cool feature, the hyper-burst system. I love it to death and I have terrorized TDM servers in Battlefield 3 with it, but my gosh I would hate to be the armorer in charge.
Boring but practical: H&K USP
If there's one thing that's consistent about me, it's my fascination with H&K.
This one is simple. I grew up playing Counter-Strike and CS clones. The USP, especially its .45 ACP version, was an object of fascination. When I learned about what a SOCOM was in Metal Gear Solid and realized the USP was a more practical version of it, my love for it grew.
It does exactly everything I like out of a pistol: it's full-sized, it is hammer-fired, capacity is decent, the original USP was purpose-built to shoot .40 S&W, meaning it's almost overly durable for 9mm and .45 ACP, it looks amazing with a suppressor on, and it has a safety lever that doubles as a decocker so I don't have to choose or mess with a trigger dingus like on a Glock.
It's also not anything special. It's boring. It looks blocky. The only thing about it on looks alone is "at least it's not a Glock." It's not even especially the most ergonomic or comfortable.
But I love it.