Part Sixteen of the Switch AU
A JSE Fanfic
[This is part of an ongoing fic series I started in April 2019. In the chaos of the kids going missing, Distorter decides to cause even more trouble for everyone by messing with Schneep.]
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It seemed absurd that, with everything going the way it was, Schneep still had to go to work. But there was nothing he could do about it, so he got up in the morning, worked seven hours at the coffee shop Latte Lake, then came home around one o’clock.
“It’s me, I’m home,” he called, opening the front door of the apartment and strolling in.
Jackie was lounging on the sofa, scrolling mindlessly through something on his phone. He looked up. “Hey, Volt,” he said. “How were things?”
Schneep huffed. “Same as ever. How are things here?”
“Ehhhh…” Jackie looked back down at the phone screen. He was a bit…listless lately, but that was to be understood, what with things being how they were. “Are you going out again tonight?”
“Yes, of course,” Schneep says. He’d been going out every night for the past few days, ever since the kids disappeared. Gone out in costume, searching. Nothing, so far. Though he wasn’t sure what he was expecting. Distorter was difficult to find. In fact, they didn’t have any clue where he stayed or hid at all. So maybe the search was impossible, but damn if he was going to just let it happen.
“Hmm…” Jackie put his phone down and buried his face in one of the throw pillows.
“Do you need anything?” Schneep asked tentatively.
“No, I’m just tired.” Jackie’s voice was muffled. “Haven’t been sleeping well. Talking with Rama through FaceTime.”
“Ah. I see.” Schneep wondered if he would be able to hear that, if he was ever home before Jackie fell asleep. After all, his ‘bedroom’ only had a single wall separating it from the rest of the studio apartment. Any noise Jackie made from where he was sleeping on the couch was pretty audible. “Well anyways.” He draped his jacket across the back of the nearest chair and headed into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him.
Just as he stepped inside, the alarm on his phone went off. “Ja, ja,” he muttered, switching it off. He knew what that meant. The bathroom was a bit smaller than the average one, but it was pretty good-sized for an apartment. He leaned over the counter and opened the medicine cabinet behind the mirror, taking out a small bottle. Idly, he opened it, only to freeze. Since when was it empty? He could have sworn he was good for the next two weeks.
He took his phone out of his pocket and dialed a number from his contacts. Bouncing in place, he listened to it ring on the other side until it was picked up. “Hello, Dr. Akela speaking.”
“Hello Malcolm?” Schneep said. “It is Henrik. I was just calling to check on if you could, ahhh, send me my next prescription now?”
“Now? Is something wrong?” Malcolm sounded puzzled.
“I just went to take it for today and my medication bottle is empty,” Schneep explained.
“What? Already? Hang on a second, I need to check something.” There was the sound of fabric rustling and keyboard tapping on the other line. Schneep waited patiently. After a while, Malcolm hummed. “Yeah, that should have lasted you a month. It’s only been two weeks.”
“That’s what I was thinking!” Schneep sighed in relief. He’d been worried for a moment there that he’d lost track of time. “I do not know why it’s empty, I’ve only taken one per day.”
“You’re sure it’s only one?” Malcolm asked. “And you haven’t lost any?”
“No, no I am sure.”
“That’s, uh…this is going to sound unprofessional, but if that’s really the case, then that’s weird,” Malcolm said. “I haven’t gotten in your next prescription yet, that was gonna happen on Friday.”
“A week from now?!” Schneep half-shouted.
“Hey, I know it’s frustrating, but there’s nothing I can do about it.” Malcolm paused. “Maybe ask your new roommate if he knows anything about what happened to it.”
Schneep bit back a laugh. Yeah, he was going to ask Jackie about this. Jackie didn’t even know he took medication, let alone what it was for. Still, he said, “Yes, sure.”
“Great. Can you swing by the office on Friday or should I mail it directly to you?”
“I can stop by. Goodbye, Malcolm.”
“See you on Friday.”
Schneep hung up the call, thinking. He really could’ve sworn he still had two weeks’ worth of medication left. What could’ve happened? He glanced around uneasily. Could someone have…done something? Who? Sure, Jackie had the means, but not the motive. He had a niggling feeling that a certain black-eyed smiling creature was behind it, but there was no proof…still, if anyone would want to tamper with this, it was him.
He tried to push the what-ifs away for now and concentrate on the facts. Friday was six days away. Symptoms would certainly be showing up by then, or at least growing into larger problems than just inconveniences. But they wouldn’t be unmanageable. Probably not. He could survive six days.
So he took a deep breath, and headed out of the bathroom.
“Hey have you talked to JJ recently?” Jackie asked.
“Huh?” Schneep startled. “Ah…not since we met up the day before last. Should I talk with him?”
“Maybe,” Jackie said. “I think he needs some cheering up. I would in that situation, you know?”
He nodded slowly. Yes of course. If he’d been injured in a trap by Distorter, unsure if he would ever be able to speak again, he would be feeling a little down, at the very least. Maybe he would text him. But at the same time, he thought that if he did, he’d just dump all his worries about the missing medication on him. After all, JJ and Marvin were the only people he’d told about his condition. And neither of them needed any more pressure right now. So maybe tomorrow, then, when things had settled down just a bit.
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Schneep had always preferred night to day. Which was partly why he usually went out on patrol after dark. It was also partly because he had work during the day, of course. Had to make time whenever he could.
He sat on the edge of a fire escape, staring up at the sky. Only a few stars could be seen—light pollution, of course—but the moon was bright and close. It was quite peaceful. He sighed, wishing he’d thought to bring a cup of coffee with him. But even if he had, he would have to make sure he was out of sight so he could take his mask off and drink it, and it might be more trouble than it was worth. Not for the first time, he regretted that he designed the suit with the mask covering his mouth. But it was too late now. Well, whatever. It was fine, and kept his face less recognizable.
Stretching, he stood up and jumped down to the street below, landing solidly as his specially-designed boots absorbed most of the impact. Recovering quickly, he headed out, continuing the same search he had the last few days, looking for any sign of the kids, Michelle and William. Of course the patrol wasn’t the only part of the search. He was also scouring the local news and Internet, keeping a devoted track of anything that could’ve been a sign of Distorter or the kids. But going out and actively looking around for anything odd was a key part of this. And he still had to keep a hold on any crime, of course. Though luckily, it had been quiet lately.
There wasn’t anyone out on the streets right now. His eyes darted about, looking for anything odd.
“/Hellooooo!/”
Schneep gasped, and whirled around. No, it couldn’t be that easy. But it was. Distorter was standing in front of him, right in the middle of the sidewalk. His ever-present grin seemed more genuinely cheerful than usual, and that made him uneasy. He immediately raised his hands, fists clenched.
Distorter laughed. “/No, calm down, I’m not here for a fight today./”
“I find that hard to believe,” Schneep growled. The last time he’d run into Distorter out on his own, the creature had stabbed him with some poison blade, almost killing him, and took Jackie in the resulting chaos. And now he’d taken others…“Where are the kids, you motherfucker?!”
“/Not here to talk about that, either, but if it’ll help you feel better, they’re fine,/” Distorter said. “/They’re safe! /What kind of monster do you think I am, to hurt kids?/”
Schneep didn’t respond to that. He wasn’t about to trust anything he said. Instead, his eyes scanned Distorter up and down, trying to anticipate an attack.
“/On edge, huh? /Wonder why that is./” Distorter held up his hand, fingers clenched into a fist. “/Could it be because of…this?/” He opened his hands, and a few small white things fell, dropping onto the ground.
“What do you—” His eyes widened. No, he’d recognize that anywhere. “I knew it!” He lunged forward.
“/Nope!/” Distorter laughed, and before Schneep even got close, he threw a fistful of the pills—because that’s what they were, of course—into the nearest storm drain. Schneep stumbled to a stop, gaping. He looked down, seeing a few left on the sidewalk below. Before he could even think about if it was embarrassing to do so, he fell to the ground and scrambled about to try and pick up the pills left. Only for them to fade away, mere illusions. Distorter laughed harder. “/Wonder what others would say to see that. /It’s hilarious. /Aren’t you supposed to be a self-proclaimed hero? /Crawling on the ground?/”
Schneep shot up and swung a fist. It connected with Distorter’s chin with a crack! and a discharge of electricity, making him stagger backwards. He honestly hadn’t expected it to make contact, so he stumbled as well. “Son of a bitch,” he growled. “Why?! What did you do with them?!”
“/Your pills? /Uh, I just threw it in the sewer, thought that was obvious./” Distorter rolled his shoulders in what could have been a shrug, but it was a bit too…flexible. “/And as for why? /Well, you’re alive, unfortunately. /So I’ve decided to stop trying for the moment. /And instead of killing you, what if I just make you as miserable as possible?/” His grinned widened. “/How long would it take for you to give up?/”
For a moment, Schneep was speechless. Then, he laughed. “You think that anything you could do would wear me down? You are wrong! So fucking wrong! I have lived through worse than what you can do to me!”
“/Hmmm are you sure?/” Distorter tapped his fingernails on his arm. “/Why are you so concerned about the others knowing, then?/”
Schneep stiffened. “I…I am not going into details with you.”
“/It’s because you’re scared./” Distorter took a step forward. The air seemed to shiver around him, making it hard to focus on him. “/Scared of what they’ll think of you. /You know how most people react hearing about this condition of yours, hmm? /You’ve experienced it enough times./ The last thing you want is for your friends to think of you that way, think of you as out of control or even dangerous./” He laughed. “I/t’ll be harder for you to keep it from them now, won’t it? /Now that dear Jackie is staying with you. /I wonder—/”
“Shut the fuck up!” He tried to swing another punch, but the world shimmered and shifted, and Distorter was now standing to his left, watching him stumble. He regained his balance, then whirled on him. “They would not care. They are different.”
“/Then why haven’t you said anything yet?”/ Distorter tilted his head. “/It’s been, what, five years since you met them? /Plenty of opportunities./”
And despite his desire to shout at Distorter, to profess his trust in his friends, Schneep still hesitated.
“/Exactly./” Distorter giggled a bit, and then disappeared. Schneep balked for a second, but of course it was another illusion. Distorter’s voice still echoed from the same spot. “/Anyway, that’s all I wanted to say. /Good luck for the next…six days, was it? /I’ll be watching./”
For a long moment, Schneep kept standing there. He knew that he should probably be trying to follow Distorter, finding out where he lived—or…lurked, or whatever—and where he’d taken the kids. But he was just frozen.
Eventually, he pushed it out of his mind. Distorter was messing with him, as he was messing with all of them. He wouldn’t let him get to him. It was just six days. It would be fine. And with that, he continued on.
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He went to work again the next morning, because he, unfortunately, needed money. And just like the previous day, he entered the apartment, announcing “It’s me, I’m home.”
Jackie was on the phone. He waved at Schneep as he entered, then returned to whatever conversation he was having. “No, I can’t think of anyone. You already asked Rama, right?” He paused. “Well…yes, it’s a possibility. But the, um…other thing is also a possibility.”
Schneep paused, listening curiously for a moment. Then the alarm on his phone went off. He swore softly, hurrying to turn it off. For some reason, even though he’d scheduled it for the same time every day after work, he hadn’t been expecting it. Giving Jackie an apologetic look, he headed over to the kitchen area and grabbed a bag of pretzels.
“Alright, let me know, of course,” Jackie said. “Yeah. Yeah. Okay, goodbye.” He hung up, and sighed.
“What was that?” Schneep asked, curious.
“It was one of those detectives, Kikelomo,” Jackie explained. “I told you those two were assigned to Michelle and William’s case, right?”
“Yes.”
“She was wondering if there was anyone who, uh…didn’t like me, I guess? She explained it like having any enemies, but I dunno, that’s a strong word.” He paused. “You know…because there’s no sign of who we know actually took them, so the police are looking for other possible leads.”
“Hmm.” Schneep nodded silently, opening up the bag of pretzels. “I…unfortunately, I have not found anything.”
“I don’t expect you to,” Jackie said softly. “I think…I think that we must start looking in that…place. But to be honest, I…don’t even know where that is.”
Schneep paused. “The…place where he kept you?”
Jackie nodded. “I don’t remember getting there. And when I finally got out, I was…wasn’t really paying attention to where I was. So I have no idea where…you know.”
“What about…that Stacy lady?” Schneep asked. “She found you, so wherever that was, it was probably nearby to that place.”
Jackie looked over at him, eyes wide. “I…hadn’t even thought of that. I-I guess I could ask her where that was. But how would I bring that up?”
“Just ask, it will be fine,” Schneep said reassuringly. “Or if you want, one of us could ask her.”
“No, I can do it. God, why haven’t any of us thought of that before?”
Schneep shrugged. Jackie looked down, and he recognized the way his eyes were starting to glaze over. Quickly, he changed the subject. “Do you want a pretzel?”
Jackie laughed. “Yeah, sure.”
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Things started to go downhill on the second day after losing his medication. At work, he snapped at his coworker Jennifer to stop whispering to herself, it was very distracting. Jennifer had been startled, and denied any whispering. Hearing that, Schneep’s heart sunk, pulled down with dreadful anticipation. Already? He thought it would be another couple days…Though if the symptoms were manifesting now, it could possibly explain the listless feeling he’d had that morning, which had been dragging at him throughout his shift.
He tried not to show how shaken he was once coming home, and Jackie didn’t seem to notice. So he prepared to go out that night again, as normal.
Luckily, it was another uneventful night. Because he wasn’t sure how much he’d be able to concentrate on stopping any crime with the constant background noise that he couldn’t escape. He could barely make himself patrol, and found nothing in his search.
He was tired. Not physically, though he knew his sleep schedule had much to be desired. No, this was a mental sort of worn-down, and he just knew it would get worse throughout the next few days.
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He had a day off, and naturally ended up sleeping in. But he woke up to the sound of people talking. What was it, a whole crowd? Or was he even really hearing it? He stood up, stretched, and peeked around the wall separating his sleeping area from the front room. “Oh. Hello, Anti.”
Anti and Jackie were sitting and talking, Jackie on the sofa and Anti curled up on a chair nearby. “Hey Volt,” Anti said, waving.
“Oh, was I not supposed to let him in?” Jackie asked, a note of anxiety in his voice. “He just showed up at the door—wait, we woke you up didn’t we? Sorry, super sorry.”
“Is fine, you didn’t wake me up,” Schneep assured him, even though they really did. “What are you doing here, Anti?”
“Thought I’d stop by,” Anti shrugged. He didn’t look too good, in all honesty, with dark bags under his eyes and wearing wrinkled clothes. “I dunno. Anyway, Sam is here, too, because they won’t leave me alone.” A green eyeball popped up into the air, bouncing a couple times.
“Ah!” Schneep jumped a bit, taking a few steps back.
“You okay?” Jackie asked.
“Yes, that just…startled me, that is all.” Schneep let out a breath. “Anyway. You two keep going, talking about…whatever you were talking about.” He headed over to the kitchen area, getting ready to start the coffeemaker.
Jackie hesitated. “Well…we were just talking about the kids,” he said carefully. “Nothing…serious, just…talking about them.”
“Oh.” Schneep blinked. “Yes, that…makes sense. I suppose that is what most parents do.”
“If you had kids, would you want to talk about them?” Jackie asked.
“I…probably, yes.” Schneep hadn’t really thought of it before. He liked kids, yes, but he wasn’t really looking for them yet. He didn’t even have a partner. Well, he’d leave them to it. He turned on the coffeemaker, letting the sound fill the room. And he leaned a bit closer. The noise was drowning out the wordless conversation going on in the background of his head. That was…worrying, that he was hearing that. He’d have to tell Dr. Akela about that.
“Volt!”
He gasped and straightened. “Ah—yes, yes? I am here?”
“God, you must be pretty tired,” Anti said. “We’ve been trying to talk to you for like five minutes. Your coffee’s done.”
Schneep looked over at the coffeemaker and realized it was no longer making noise. When had that happened? “Ah. Thank you.”
Anti narrowed his eyes. “You know I can leave or something if you want to go back to sleep.”
“No, it is fine, I insist.” Schneep grabbed a mug from the nearest cupboard, and was about to pour the coffee in when a sudden glowing green orb shoved itself into his face. “Aack! Sam!” He carefully batted them away. “What is wrong with you?” They stayed around his head, shoving against his cheek like a pet begging for attention. “Anti, control your…strange…eyeball…pet.”
“Hey, they’re not mine!” Anti protested. “And they’re a lot smarter than a pet! I think. I dunno, I never really had a proper pet.”
“Really? Not even as a kid?” Jackie asked.
“Not a REAL one,” Anti emphasized. “I tried to kidnap a couple of birds as pets, some squirrels, a badger once—that was a bad idea.”
“Jesus, didn’t your mom ever say no?” Jackie said, shocked.
“Nah, she didn’t really care,” Anti leaned back against the chair. “I’d go out into the woods around town and just bring back animals and as long as they didn’t destroy anything, she didn’t care. Didn’t really care about much at all, really.” Suddenly, he stiffened, clamping his mouth shut. He reached into his jacket pocket, where he seemed to be grabbing something. A pocket knife, most likely, knowing him.
“My parents would have murdered me if I brought ANY animal home,” Schneep muttered. “Always on about keeping the carpets clean. And looking presentable.” There was a distinct note of bitterness in his voice as he continued. “All the image, all the time. Always their word the end of everything, because clearly they knew what was best. Do not even bother to ask.” He finished pouring the coffee, taking a sip of the hot, hot liquid. Honestly, he was glad they had no idea where he was. Not like they were actually upset when he first left. It was more about the idea of having their son get away than it was about his well being.
Jackie looked between the two of them, eyes sympathetic but saying nothing. “Well…Rama was thinking about getting a dog or something,” he said after a moment. “After Michelle…gets back, we were thinking we’d go adopt one.”
“Big dog?” Anti asked.
“Dunno.”
“You’d probably want an energetic one, to keep up with her. Google good family dogs, or something.”
“Jackie if you get a big dog I am never coming over to your house again,” Schneep warned. “You are on thin ice for getting a dog of any kind.”
“Aw, Volt, I’m sure if you spend time around some dogs, they won’t be as scary,” Jackie said.
“Yeah sure, fine. I will spend time with your new dog. Watching it. From the other side of the room.” Still, Schneep couldn’t help but chuckle. “Get one that is good with cats, too, then Marvin’s cat can be friends with it.”
The conversation continued for a few more minutes before Anti decided he wanted to leave. Sam followed, of course, seemingly attached to him. And by then, Schneep had almost forgotten about the noise in his head. Almost. He appreciated the distraction, at least.
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“Jackie, please stop hovering!” Schneep snapped, whirling his desk chair around so he could face the shadow peering over his shoulder. “You are like a helicopter!”
“Uh…what?” Jackie’s voice didn’t come from the figure’s location. Instead, the bathroom door opened, and Jackie poked his head out. “Sorry, I didn’t quite catch that.”
Schneep visibly paled. “Um…never mind, it is nothing.”
“You said my name, though?” Jackie turned the statement into a question in his confusion.
“No, never mind, go back to…what you were doing. What were you doing?”
Jackie blinked. “I was…going to try to take a shower. I told you that. About two minutes ago. Didn’t you hear me?”
“Oh, uh…no. Sorry.” Schneep looked down, embarrassed.
“Right. Well, uh…I’m gonna try to take a shower. You might want to check on me in, like, ten minutes. Just in case.” He swung the door closed again.
Schneep breathed out, shakily. It was DEFINITELY getting worse. Though he now knew Jackie was in the bathroom, and could hear the faint trickling of water (Jackie rarely ever turned the water up to a high pressure), he could also swear there was another version of him, standing behind his shoulder. He could see the familiar figure, though if he tried to look at it directly, it would always stay in the corner of his vision.
It was fine. Just a couple more days. He swiveled back around, facing his computer, where he was…well, he didn’t really know. Just mindlessly refreshing a few different websites. He didn’t want to do anything in particular.
The figure in the corner of his vision seemed to move closer. But he ignored it. Even though his instincts told him there was someone standing right behind him, face close to him, he knew it wasn’t real, and therefore, wasn’t to be acknowledged.
“/Stop ignoring me./”
Schneep bit back a shriek as he shot to his feet, whirling around. Familiar laughter echoed through the room, going from one corner to the next. He slowly edged along the wall. The figure still stood by his desk chair, but he didn’t look at it. But maybe he should. Because what if it was really…?
Something appeared, sitting on his kitchen table. He jumped, whirling on it, only for it to immediately disappear. “/This is so EASY,/” the familiar voice said, sounding delighted. “/I’m barely putting any effort into my illusions! /Can you just stop taking those pills altogether? /It would make things much less difficult for me./”
“Shut up,” Schneep hissed. “Shut up shut up shut up shut up—”
And again, laughter. It multiplied upon itself, layers and layers of laughing, and he knew it was laughing at him. He couldn’t help but shrink back against the wall. The figure from before walked up towards him, staying just in his peripheral. And there was another one coming from the other side. He grabbed a pen from his desk and threw it towards the second one, to make sure it was really there. It looked like it passed right through, but was that…really happening?
“/Can’t trust your eyes, can you?/” Shadows crawled down the walls. “/Am I even here right now?/ Well, you just don’t know./”
There were more figures. They were starting to fill the room. His head twisted on a pivot to try and keep an eye on them—or look away from them—or try to see which ones are there—or something! They looked like his friends. But their eyes were black, bleeding, just like Distorter’s. He had to be here, right? That had to be why he was seeing things in such great numbers.
He sank to the ground, starting to hyperventilate. The shadows on the wall were warping, distorting. He tried to move, staying close to the wall. But he had no idea where he was in the room. Was he even moving at all?
The shadows kept moving, twisting, forming faces and shapes before fading away. He tried not to look at them. Where was the room’s door? Maybe if he left the apartment, this would end—
Something touched him.
He reacted instinctively, lunging forward blindly. Hitting something solid, he tackled it to the ground. Grabbing in a panic, rolling across the ground, he wondered if he should strike, because this was something, something, it had to be Distorter, he was here mocking him—more laughter!—and that had to be stopped, he’d shake it out of him, he had to stop this!
“…Hen…Henrik, it’s me.”
Schneep blinked, and suddenly things seemed clearer without the sudden, intense feelings. It wasn’t Distorter, it was just…Jackie. He’d pinned Jackie to the ground, one hand balled in his hoodie, the other wrapped around one of his wrists. And Jackie stared at him, wide-eyed but otherwise strangely calm. Missing his glasses, and with wet hair from the shower. The shadows on the walls aren’t there anymore, neither are most of the figures. There was nothing really there.
Gasping, he pulled back, standing up. “Jackie! I-I am so sorry, did I hurt you? Oh mein god, I did, I am sorry, sorry, I—”
“I’m fine, Volt,” Jackie said softly, sitting up. “Are…are you?”
“Am I?”
“You were…on the floor, crawling around.” Jackie explained. “I think you were saying something? I don’t know, it might’ve been in German. I just wanted to check on you, but you didn’t say anything when I talked to you, so I thought I could…I dunno. Just that contact would help. But you, uh…freaked out.”
Schneep felt his heart sink with every new word. He took a few steps away from Jackie, shaking his head slightly.
“You…so anyway, are you okay?” Jackie repeated. He reached out, then stopped and pulled back.
“I…am fine,” Schneep said slowly. Unconvincingly.
“Are you sure?”
“I do not want to talk about it.” His tone was firm.
“A-ah—right.” Jackie backed up. “Well, I’m…gonna sit down for a bit.” And he wandered over to the sofa, sat down, closing his eyes. He didn’t move.
Schneep hurried over to the bedroom area. He didn’t want to say he was hiding behind the wall, but there was no other way to describe it. What he’d just done—it was an accident! It was. But that didn’t matter. Jackie was wary of him, he could tell. Unnerved. Freaked out. Scared. Of him. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he buried his face in his hands. One of his best friends was scared of him.
It was only a matter of time. Soon they’d all think he was dangerous, that he would lash out at any minute. It was an accident! But that excuse never helped. They’d find out what was really going on with him, and then they would say, that explains everything! The last thing he ever, ever wanted was to hurt people, much less his friends. And he couldn’t bear the thought that they’d think he would. But it would happen. They would think the worst of him.
He stayed in the bedroom area for the rest of the day. Jackie never came to check on him.
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Thursday morning, he woke up early. He didn’t mean to. It was just that he usually worked this day, so of course his alarm was set and he’d forgotten to turn it off. Even though he’d called in to work and gotten someone else to cover his shift because he just couldn’t handle working with people right now. Groaning, he slapped the button on his phone to stop the annoyingly cheerful jingle. But now he was up. And unlike most people, he was never able to get back to sleep after being awoken by something.
He stared up at the ceiling. The patterns in the plaster shifted into eyes. Watching him.
Shivering, he got out of bed and started to get dressed as quietly as possible. He didn’t want to wake up Jackie, sleeping on the sofa. God…recently he’d been wishing he’d gotten a different style of apartment, one with more…rooms. There wasn’t a lot of privacy in the studio design. Which hadn’t been a problem until Jackie came to stay.
Jackie, luckily, wasn’t awake. They hadn’t…interacted much since that incident.
Schneep stared at him for a while. Then, before he even knew what he was doing, he was leaving the apartment. Heading down to the bus stop. Not getting onto the line he’d take to work, but instead a different one, that would take him to the east side of the city.
It was still some walk to get to where he was going. He still wasn’t exactly sure why he was going there, he just knew that he needed…something.
Soon, he was knocking on a door, bouncing in place while he waited. Slow footsteps on the other side, and then it opened. “Oh hello—no, Mister, stay away from the door! Go back!—hello, Henrik. Anyt’ing I can do for you?” Marvin smiled.
“Hello, Marvin.” Schneep tried to smile. It didn’t work. “Um…may I come inside?”
“O’course.” Marvin stood to the side as Schneep brushed past him, quickly shutting the door behind him as Mr. Fluffington walked up close. “No. No cats outside, Mister.” He waved his cane in the cat’s general direction, and Fluffington responded by trotting away and weaving around Schneep’s legs. “Anyway, y’need somet’ing?”
“I just…” Schneep took a deep breath. “Am having trouble. Lately. With certain…things.”
He didn’t have to explain anything else. Marvin looked confused for a moment, but then nodded. “Well, y’can stay here for a while, I s’pose. Jems is in the parlor if you want t’talk to him.”
Schneep nodded, and ducked inside the other room. JJ was sitting on the sofa, leaning on an arm and scrolling through his phone. Upon hearing the footsteps, he looked up, surprised. Then he picked up a nearby pen and notebook and wrote down. 'Oh hello Volt. It’s nice to see you! Do you need anything?'
“I…need to just…” Another deep breath. “My medication. It…ran out. Unexpectedly. Last week.” He paused. “Can I just…stay with the two of you?”
JJ’s eyes widened, and he glanced over at Marvin standing in the doorway. Y'es, of course,' he wrote. 'Is there anything else?'
“No, it is fine.” Schneep sat down on the sofa next to Jameson, leaning back and closing his eyes. “Just some time, please.”
The two of them seemed to understand. And so some time passed in silence. It was…comfortable. Staying in the living room while JJ looked through his phone and Marvin read in his usual armchair. After a while Mr. Flufflington jumped onto Schneep’s lap and promptly fell asleep, preventing him from leaving even if he wanted to.
But soon, Schneep felt his phone start to buzz in his pocket. He didn’t look at it, not wanting to ruin the moment. Yet it kept buzzing.
Ding! A text tone went off. Schneep jumped and looked around, unsure if he really heard that or if it was just part of the noise. But then he saw Jameson typing something out and shrugged it off. Until Jameson gave him an odd look. And then a couple more as he continued the text conversation. After a while, he put the phone down and picked up the notebook, writing, 'Jackie was wondering where you were. Apparently you aren’t responding to his messages.'
“Oh.” Schneep squirmed, though that soon got an upset look from Fluffington, so he stopped. “Well…my phone is in my pocket. And there is a cat here.”
'Well I told him you were here, and he’s coming over.'
“What?!” The sudden startled motion definitely dislodged Fluffington, who jumped off and walked away. “Oh no, sorry kitty!” Schneep looked at JJ. “Why did you say that?!”
'He was worried,' Jameson explained. 'He thought you-know-who was behind it. So now he’s coming by, and Anti said he might come too because apparently Jackie sent him a few freaked-out messages before he texted me.'
Schneep looked down. Jackie was going to be so upset, knowing he made him worry over nothing. Well, no way to avoid it.
It seemed like only a few minutes later when the doorbell rang. Marvin got up to get it again. Schneep tried to sink further into the sofa cushions, and JJ put a hand on his leg as a show of support. Soon Jackie came bursting into the room. “Henrik! What happened?! Why’d you leave?! I mean I don’t mind if you have somewhere to go but usually you tell me. Is something wrong?”
Anti and Marvin appeared behind him. “Y’know I think something IS wrong,” Anti muttered. “Volt, you look like a kid heading to detention after school. What happened?”
Schneep was talking before he was even fully aware of it. “Jackie, I am so sorry, I made you worry for nothing, I do not even know why I came here, probably because these two already know, which would make it easier, and also they have a cat and that makes a lot better, but now I made you worry about nothing and I know I am a bad friend but I promise I would not hurt you ever, I really do, anyway I was on autopilot walking here, feeling sort of out of all sorts of energy and I don’t know, I thought it would help maybe—”
“Jesus fuck, man,” Anti said. “Slow down and breathe, maybe.”
“What are you talking about?” Jackie asked. “I know you wouldn’t hurt me. Is…is this still about the thing that happened yesterday?”
“It is not me!” Schneep stood up. “I promise you, this is not an indication of who I really am, you know who I am, I have not been hiding anything from you—well, yes, I have, but nothing that is any big indication of who I am, it is just that I ran out, and that changes things—”
“Ran out of what?” Jackie asked, baffled.
“My medication!” Schneep blurted out. “I take—it is called Zyprexa, or something like that, I cannot quite remember right now. I will have to ask Malcolm when I see him tomorrow, or I could just check the labelling—”
“Henrik, please, slow down,” Jackie said, laughing a bit. “I can’t keep up. You take something? I didn’t know that. But there’s nothing wrong with that, you know I do, too. And JJ does, right?” He glanced over at JJ, who nodded. “There’s nothing wrong with that.”
“It is different,” Schneep insisted. “Yours are to regulate your focus and such, this is…it is different.”
Jackie frowned. “It can’t be that different?”
“Uhh…” Anti coughed awkwardly. “I mean, not in principle, but I get the feeling this is…I don’t want to say ‘different’ again cause the two of you have said that enough.” He paused. “Zyprexa is an antipsychotic, and so it, you know, has different effects than your guys’ Dexedrine and Adderall and—”
“Anti, how do you know what I take?” Jackie asked.
“That’s beside the point,” Anti hurriedly said. “The point is that…Schneep is trying to say something.”
Schneep felt his breath shake, coming out shorter. “I—I—I—” He squeezed his eyes shut. “I cannot. Marvin, Jamie, I told you, you tell them.”
“Are you sure?” Marvin asked. He waited for Schneep to nod. “Well…if you know for sure.” And he turned to Jackie and Anti. “Henrik talked to me one day, I t’ink it was last winter. He said he…has a condition. And t’at he sometimes sees t’ings. Not real t’ings, just…in his head. I s’pose there are other symptoms, too.”
Jackie’s eyes slowly widened. His mouth formed a small O shape. Anti didn’t say anything.
Schneep opened his eyes. “I…could not say anything to you two,” he said slowly. “It is different with these ones, I thought…thought Marvin would understand, which he has. And Jamie just stumbled upon it, really. But I was not so bothered, I think, because I have not known them for so long.” Tears started to build. “You two—I-I care for you very much and—and now that you think the worst of me—”
“Wait, what the fuck?!” Anti burst in. “No! I don’t think the worst of you, what the hell?”
“I know how it is,” Schneep mumbled. “People always think, ‘you have this thing, you are dangerous.’ I am a little odd, perhaps, but I would never, ever—”
“Volt, for fuck’s sake.” Anti sounded exasperated, but not in a bad way. “First off, the stigma around psychosis is stupid. Always has been. I blame poorly-researched movies and shit. Second of all, that doesn’t change who you are. You are our friend.”
“But yesterday, I—Jackie, I—”
“That’s why you freaked out,” Jackie whispered. “You were—were seeing things that weren’t there.”
“I did not mean to hurt you,” Schneep said desperately. “And I am so, so sorry, I-I thought—” The tears were actively flowing now. “It was that Distorter, he took it to mess with me—a-and he might have been there, making it worse with his—his fucking illusions—I do not know, I can never tell if he is really there or if I am just—I am sorry—”
Jackie stepped forward and wrapped him in a tight hug.
All words left him. Schneep’s mind went blank. This was not…not what he was expecting at all.
“No, I’M sorry,” Jackie said. “I’m sorry you have to go through this. That you thought I would be anything but one hundred percent supportive. I am so sorry you felt like you had to hide this. You’re one of my best friends, Henrik. I’ll always be here for you.”
His breath hitched in his throat. “But…yes-yesterday, I must have scared you—”
“I won’t lie, I was a bit shocked,” Jackie said, laughing a bit. “But it was a mistake, Hen. I know this. And I forgive you for it. The circumstances weren’t exactly under your control.”
And with that, Schneep absolutely melted into the hug, now sobbing. For so long, he’d kept this to himself. Afraid of what would happen. How they would react. But now, seeing the two of them showing nothing but love and support…he couldn’t handle it.
The others crowded in closer. Jameson and Marvin joined in the hug. Anti opted for just putting a hand on Schneep’s shoulder, but it was essentially his equivalent of a hug. Schneep wasn’t sure how long they stayed there. A few minutes at least. Of course, it couldn’t last forever. Eventually they all pulled away, Marvin handed Schneep a handkerchief, and they moved on.
“Do you feel comfortable sharing details?” Anti asked tentatively. “Or is that too much too soon?”
“Well…” Schneep hesitated. “It feels like…disorienting, much of the time. Thoughts racing, but at the same time, I am very tired. It used to be I could not get out of bed for a few days at a time, then became very active. And of course, there are things and ideas that are not there. Very…unpleasant.”
“Should we, like, do anything for you?” Jackie asked. “Like, do you want us to help?”
“I…have heard a thing about taking a picture of something,” Schneep said slowly. “And sending it to others to see if it is really there.”
Anti suddenly slapped his own forehead. “That’s what you told me to do with Sam! Then you said it was a mean joke when I sent the picture of them! That’s how you knew to do it!”
“Yes,” Schneep said. “Anyway, I may do that sometimes. Usually I am better at telling the difference, but Distorter…his powers are just more hallucinations.”
“Oh my god.” Jackie covered his mouth. “I hadn’t even considered…that must be scary, Hen, I’m so sorry.”
“Thank you, Jackie.” Schneep smiled softly. “Ah…actually, there is another thing. Tomorrow the refill is supposed to come in. I have to go over to my therapist’s office to get it. Could one of you…drive me?”
“I could,” Jackie offered.
'And I could if that doesn’t work out,' JJ added. 'By the way, do you still want to stay here for a while longer?'
“I…if we all could,” Schneep said.
Everyone smiled, and assured him they’d stay. Jackie leaned close and said gently, “Hey. It’s going to be okay.”
And Schneep believed him.