if they actually did what they promised, and it wasn't just "here's how to G U N" over and over again.

"Oh, it's an action adventure platformer tutorial? What are your lessons?"
"Here's how to gun! Here's how to have enemies you can kill!"
"... What about the, you know, platforming part of all that?"
"What's that I can't hear you over this tutorial telling you how to kill more people."