[To the tune of "she'll be comin' round the mountain":]
There's a very angry badger in my house
There's a very angry badger in my hooouuuse
There's a very angry badger
And I'm not sure how he got here
There's a very angry badger in my houuuuse

He is sneering and he's snarling in my house
He is sneering and he's snarling in my houuuse
He is sneering and he's snarling
And he's pissing in the parlor
There's a very angry badger in my house

He is digging through the carpet in my house
He is digging through the carpet in my house
He is digging through the carpet
And I don't how to stop it
There's a very angry badger in my house

He is frothing at the mou-th in my house
He is frothing at the mou-th in my house
I think he might have rabies
Oh shit, he's got a gun
There's a very angry badger in my house

He is pawing at the safety in my house
He is pawing at the safety in my house
He is clawing at the s