i think the thing that "made me bisexual" or whatever was my journey with my gender identity, bc it made me realise there's nothing separating men, women, non-binary people, or anyone of any other gender, and that anyone of any gender can look like anything, and dress however they want, and have whatever body features/parts, and use any pronouns, so then i was kind of like. well all the features i find attractive in men, i'd also find attractive in women. or anyone else. so i kind of realised that my sexuality was more "idk just whoever i'm interested in. so bi or pan or whatever" rather than just solely gay (i mean i still call myself gay but. you know). does that make sense. feel like this post was more coherent in my head before i let it out into the wild. if gender is all made up then i'm not going to worry about the gender of the person i like or if my attraction to them makes me gay or straight or whatever.

thinking about this again. i wouldn't define my bisexuality as "i like men and women" but more like "i don't see the point in differentiating between genders"

the impact this had on me. i think "what in the lord's name art thou talking about" every day.

i'm not complaining but why the hell does my reed suddenly sound so amazing. last time i practiced i felt awful bc the sound i was making was so bad, but i just played with the same reed today and it sounds great?? when did it suddenly become so responsive above high d. i was actually able to play the bassoon solo from scheherazade and it sounded decent?? how. we're going to be playing scheherazade in a future concert and i thought i wouldn't be able to do the bassoon 1 part but now i think i probably could.

fi angen defnyddio'r gymraeg gymaint â phosib !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!