New teacher arrived from South Africa on Friday, it was his first time at work today. Asked him how his weekend was, said it was extremely cold in a mildly traumatized tone.
...the whole office gave him a look, and it was my job to inform him this weekend was actually quite warm compared to the last two weeks, and it was about to get much colder.
Too late buddy, you're already here! Buy a huge honking coat!
