lrc (last rechost) is why I'm just completely obsessed with writing coming-of-age stories that are about people entering the mid-30s-and-up stage of life. In my experience that's when you have enough perspective to start letting go of the parts of your life you were maintaining because other people thought you should and identifying which parts are really important to you, because you're able to identify and know the person you are. This is not universal but when it happens it's good.
It's interesting to me that a lot of horror deals with this as something people were unable to do for whatever reason--there are parts of you that you don't want to know, longings that you've forgotten because they were too much, that you've buried for the sake of the children, that are lying in a shallow grave out back. The next strong rain is going to cause some problems.