this time next year i might be the kind of bitch who starts her days riding in the park and i am only very bitter that incrementalism is good when it comes to medicine and learning, which is what adopting exercise for health is. i am afraid of my ability to keep redeveloping physical skills despite there not having been many problems so far once presented with the reagents, because what if it stops. what a silly terror, austerity.
i still am searching myself for the skip cutscene button on this disability porn montage because that feels so tumblr of long ago. lets get to the point already. breathing helps with that.
anyway it is so fucking me that after suffering for years with no access to diagnostic care it turns out a hefty magnitude of my problems are, in fact, "tee hee if you exercise and eat different you get to walk again" in the material way and not in the hatred way and let me tell you, being a pan-liberationist type of sort can prepare you for almost anything except your own good glob damned fair fortune. i even have a dietician who agreed with the statement "body weight is not a good primary indicator of health" like stop being so kind and relatable i can only get so hyper vigilant.
that has been going okay so far and in fact the biggest problem i have rn is i have to pack my fucking kitchen up soon so i cant really get the big boys out to help me cook ahead and develop more recipes. the cute dietician told me "eat beans and fruit and olive oil" and i could have wept because what a fuckin lanternpost in the wild of relearning how to care for myself. i take my bike to the store so i can keep fruit for breakfast now, which is a porridge made of polenta, banana, dates, applesauce, and a rotating guest star which was strawberries yesterday and will be blackberries today. i season it with a blend of salt, cinnamon, ginger, tumeric, and cardamom. stares my various ailments in the eye do not fuck with me i read ALL those redwall books and my ass is looking forward to stone fruit season in michigan
