Sharks are cool and comfortable!


Elden Thing | Back & Body Hurts Platinugggggh Rewards Member


Profile pic and banner credits: sharkaeopteryx art by @superkiak! eggbug by eggbug! Mash-up by me!
[Alt-text for pfp: a cute sharkaeopteryx sat on the ground with legs out, wings down, jaw ajar, and hed empty, looking at eggbug and eggbug's enigmatic smile.]
[Alt-text for banner: a Spirit Halloween banner with eggbug and the sharkaeopteryx that Superkiak drew for me looking at it with inscrutable expressions]


I'm a Vietnamese cis woman born and currently living in the U.S. You may know me from Sandwich, from Twitter or Mastodon (same username), or on Twitch as Sharkaeopteryx. I do not have a Discord or Bluesky account.

Ask me about language learning/teaching, cooking/eating food, late diagnosis ADHD, and volunteer small business mentoring. Or don't, I'm not the boss of you.


I think people deserve to be young, make mistakes, and grow without being held to standards they don't know about yet and are still learning. So, if you are under 22, please don't try to strike up a friendship or get involved in discussions on my posts.


Please don't automatically assume I follow/know/co-sign someone just because I reposted something from them—sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. Also, if you think being removed as a follower when we're not mutuals is a cardinal sin, please do not follow me.


🐘Mastodon
search for @sharksonaplane@mastodon.sandwich.net and hit follow if you want
Hang out with me on the Auldnoir forum! (you can DM there!)
discourse.auldnoir.org/
Follow me on Twitch
twitch.tv/sharkaeopteryx
Add my RSS feed (not working yet but I'll get to it!)
sharkaeopteryx.neocities.org/rss.xml

estrogen-and-spite
@estrogen-and-spite

I'm picking up food for someone. I go to the address. It's a bland building in a strip mall with a logo printed on 8.5x11 and and taped to the window. There's three cars in the parking lot. There's no menu. Just a desk. I'm here to pick up the order for John. I'm given a bag that smells like it's full of deep fried ambrosia. I only briefly see the arm of the person handing it to me. No words are spoken.

I'm picking up food for someone. The restaurant is called Bait and Tackle. I pull up to a Hooters. Was the address wrong? No, the app tells me. It's in the Hooters. There's a restaurant hiding in the restaurant. I get a second order, for chicken, from a different restaurant. It's in the Hooters. I get a third order, for a beating heart, from a different restaurant. It's in the Hooters. I'm in the Hooters. I go deliver to an apartment. I drive for a half hour. I get to the apartment. It's in the Hooters.

I'm picking up food for someone. I go to the address. It's a grocery store. The delivery isn't for groceries. I go and ask the cashier where Tony's is. The cashier says "Let me help you" while their eyes say "run." I'm lead to the back. There's three tables here. The chairs are on the tables. They're locked in place. There's a window behind the tables. I hear sizzling. A voice asks who I'm picking up for. I give a name. The name is theirs now. I am given a brown bag by something I tell myself is a hand. It was not a hand. I tell myself it is. The bag is covered in grease stains. I tell myself the stains are grease. It was not grease.

I'm picking up food for someone. I go to the address. It's a home. Just a house. There's a sign in front. I wonder if this is safe or legal. I go to the front door. Do I go in? Do I knock? The mailslot opens. A voice asks me who I'm picking up for. It's the same voice. They've all had the same voice. I show them the name. There is a growl. Is that a dog? It is a house. It must be a dog. I'm given a brown bag through the mail slot. It's the same brown bag I left at the last house. My fingerprints are on it.

I'm picking up food for someone. The restaurant is called Burger Den. I pull up to a Denny's. Was the address wrong? No. It's in the Denny's. I go into the Denny's. It's another Hooters. I get a second order. It's for a sandwich from a place called Melt Down. It's in the Denny's. I get a third order. It's for a 𒂍𒀀𒉌𒀭𒈠𒋮 from a place called 𒂄𒄀. It's in the Denny's. I cancel the order. I'm ready to go home.

There's a brown bag on my doorstep. My name's on it. My fingerprints are on it. I gave a name. Did I give the customer's name or my own? I open the bag. My name's in it. I left it. They gave it back. I sigh in relief, and turn around.

I'm in the Denny's.


blanktape
@blanktape
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in reply to @estrogen-and-spite's post:

As someone who works at a Carrabba's where we also serve food for a delivery-only "restaurant" called Tendershack, I can confirm that y̷̢̧̧͈̙̳͓̫͉͚̞̮̮͙͔̎͆͜o̶͎̠͕̳̫͇̣͖̲̞̰̞̦̓͂ͅu̴̧͖̻̬̱͚̦̰̇̽͑́̋͝r̸̛̛̭͕̥̻̰͖̦̍̒̈̈́̔̉̈́̍̏̀̿̚ ̶̝͓̣̋̀͊̊̈́͒̈̕͝n̷̢̜̮̫̠͇̻̭͈̻̲̅͂́̂́̓̑͒̅̍̏̀̑̌͘̚a̷̡̛̖͔̣̤̮͍͒̐̎͗͑̀̾͑̋̀̀͑͌̋͝͠m̵̢̨̺̣͈͎̝̝̠̤̝͚͔͗̈̍̔̾̐̂̐͛̀̿̑́̔̌̇ë̵̡̧̤̙͚͖͕͙͇̖͖͉̯͕̻̹́̾͗́̎͛̈́̔̃̓̔́̽̊̓͘͜͠ ̸̡̖̤͈̦̤̹̺̳͓͎͋̋̆͜ ̶̢̨̱͈̝̞͈̖̯̟̫̲̘̝̥͚̎̍̓̒̄̉͐́̋̑̄̕͜͝i̵̛͇̼͉̼̬̣̯̩̹͒̄̈́̂̀́͊̍̑̂͊͊̅̑͠ͅs̸̨̲̺̘̭̥̰͙̺͓͈̞͓̲̓̍̎́̉̀̓̓͆̈́̓̇̅̚͠ ̴̡̢͇͉͉̰̬̜̼͓̦̯̖̻̦̑́̎̾̔̊͂̓̈̾̀̈̃̓̚͝͝o̶͇̻̩̙̫̭̼̣̹͇̺̠͌̊͘̕ǘ̷̡͉̮̼͕̯̩̜͖̦̳̳̭̦̭̂̓͊́̌̎͂͠ͅr̵̯̞̞̦͎̳̉̍̚ͅs̸̡̻̤̩̓̔̓̒̅́͠ ̶̦̟̉̂̐̃̑͝ẗ̷͇͖́͗̏́̚h̸̪̥̫̯͕͚̟̬̠̺̫͕̘͖̮̄̓̏̋̏́̿͒̂͐͝͝a̶̫̬̖͉̗̖̲͖̘̟̯͇̲͗̾̽̋͋̍̈́̑̓̈́̋̏͊͊̕̕ͅǹ̶̖͉̟̗̻͒͛̈́͑͂k̶͔̣͇̬̝̝͍͍̾͛̒͊͐̈͌̐̉͌́̍͐͗̏ ̶̳̝͕̙͉͇̯̘̮̪̪̝̺̑̒̑́̆͗͒̇͑̏͌̍͑̊̈́̋͝ͅy̸̧̧͔̰̙̰͔͔͈̭̤̻͖̲͍͛̉̈́̿͂͑̊̓ǒ̵͎̥̖̞̥̠̬͎̻̱̖͑̈́u̷̖͗̄̎̒͋̽̐̍̾ ̴͎͎̟̪͉̈́͛́̓͛͑̉̈́̓̍̎̑̈́̓͝p̴̼͎̙͎̰̅ľ̸̢̢͈͎̰͈̪͔̪̪͎͊͗́͒̐̌̋̒̇̇͑̾͜ẽ̴̛͇͇͇͖̘͈̮͉͕̭̗̻̈̀͛̒̾̄͐́͌̚ā̶̢͍̤̪̹͉̰̪̺̬͙̰͍̗̻̲̻̇̈́͂̈́̄͒͛̆̿͂̉͠s̷͉̱̺͚̦̮͙͉͎̃̄͜ͅe̴̛̛͕͗̇̓͛ͅ ̸̧̞̘͕̭̼̉̿̎͝c̴̡͚̬͉͍̗̹̅͐̀̔̾̂̏͑͌̌̒͋̆͠͝͠ͅo̸̩͙̘̲̽̂̚m̶̢̥͔̖̱͓̺̉̈͑̂͝ê̷̢̢̗͔͍̟̰̜͔̠͉̬̪̦͔̖̍̿͑̒̚͜ ̷̨̧̢̙͕̦̟͍̱̲͙̰̩̈͆̒͂̎̎͐̉͐͂͂̈́̂͗͜͝ḁ̷̢̛̩̺̺͉̮̦̻̎̈́͑ģ̵̧̥͇̦̩̰̹̘̗̊̓̊̔̓̎̍̄̆̓͋͒͌͘͝ͅa̷͕̭̻̱͎̜̣̳̍͜ͅi̶̧̨̩̲̤̣̱̯̹̲͚̺̬̥̯̜͍̇̔̓̇̊̏̅́n̶̰̘͔̮̜̰̝̯̰̪̰̯̣͛͌̍̚͘͜