around 20 average british dudes were all in a line up on stage. pants down, balls out, toilet sat. each had just had a very large meal and were waiting it out to see who would poop the last. the most constipated person was the winner. across from the stage was a giant projector screen displaying motivational content to help them poop. video of trains coming out of tunnels. waterfalls. "you can do it!" encouraging text.
a dry british comedy man was the announcer and host for the evening. at random intervals he would go up and down the line interviewing the pooping men. just standard puff piece questions like "what do you do? what brought you here today?" the most important part was "what charity are you playing for?" because the gameshow was also a fundraiser. at any point, someone from the tv audience at home could call in and make a donation for a specific pooping player. that player would then be given either a shot of prune juice or antidiarrheals. either way the contribution was counted to the charity of choice.
constipation throwdown was broadcast live and lasted for hours. the winner would be invited back for the next one, but no one ever accepted that offer.
that was..... something.
