actually. i realized why failgirl or failenby is so liberating
i think? because girls as a class and most enbies in general are gender marginalized, they're expected to uphold a standard of perfection that most people in general can't achieve
they have to look good, they have to care about their appearance, they have to care about how they come across to others, they have to be productive at all times, they have to care about how intelligent they appear to people, they have to care what people think of them, they have to care how people perceive their personalities
but failgirls and failenbies subvert that
because like. failgirls and failenbies don't care about looks. they can be as fat hairy and smelly as they want and they still like themselves because they believe their unique traits, rather than any standard of perfection, makes them beautiful
failgirls and failenbies don't care about how smart they are. they know they can just win people's friendships or maintain the friendships they have by simply being themselves
failgirls and failenbies don't care about acceptable personality traits or masking. they think people should care about them by virtue of who they are and if they don't like them then it's fine if they don't
failgirls and failenbies don't even care about sex and romance! to them, it's something that can come with them in time, but a lot of them don't seem to care about being perfectly ready for a (heterosexual, usually) romance (and usually end up better off in queer spaces)
i realized that the letting go of perfection and feeling like you're good the way you are is a failgirl or failenby trait in of itself and it's...liberating because that's what i was like before i thought i had to be like "popular people" to be liked
that's the appeal of a failgirl or a failenby
