a rabbit hunting deer

on itch

what happens when you fuck someone whose guts you hate but also love

an alternate universe yuui from wretched star and strawberry sour where yuui and hotaru are kemonomimis (animal ears). hotaru is a wolf, and yuui is a rabbit. contrary to the popular "alpha wolf" misconception, wolves are incredibly loyal and fiercely cooperative pack animals. rabbits, on the other hand, are viciously hierarchical. rabbits are known for their dominance contests.

yes, hotaru physically bigger than tiny rabbit-bodied yuui, but hotaru is also naturally submissive / cooperative due to that same wolf heritage when put up against a more dominant force, which is basically anyone.

hotaru and yuui fucking hate each other's guts. but, they love each other too, so painfully deeply.

like yuuichirou says in an as-yet unrelated game, DOMINE: rival, tenteki, love sinks and holds its shape. hate floats like oil on the surface, and disperses. what this means is that love holds a lot of weight, and it's love that stays. love is heavy, it bears weight, but it holds its shape, and cannot be convinced to change it. hate floats like oil on water.

a personal challenge for this one was to render all the graphics using ms paint, as inspired by an ms paint jam, but they did not accept 18+ submissions, so here's this

ELEVENTH is a game in development for the playdate that's about INVIOLET TRUONG and SACROSANCT (SUKUNA) who are presented symbolically as a deer and a mythical bird. OMNISCIENCE v. OMNIPOTENCE: which god will win?

TW: SUICIDE

it is about the relationship between two people who are continually locked in a cycle of saving one another from suicide ("if one of us dies...Then We Both Will" [crane tail]) and it's rly about time-gods and time-keeping and the kind of time you do and don't keep when you Have Neurological Problems and Issues some of which stem from complex post-traumatic stress disorder and some of which stem from having an undiagnosed seizure disorder. among other things.

but inviolet is the timekeeper and the HUMAN THAT SACRIFICED ALL OF HUMANITY to save not just a curse but the worst (sacrosanct).

inviolet is named for "THOUGH NOTHING IS INVIOLATE, I KNOW THERE IS STILL SACRED LEFT."

sacrosanct is named for "NOTHING IS INVIOLATE, NOR IS IT SACROSANCT."

they're about the infinite struggle / infinity loop / double helix / 天与呪縛 / 無限の形 / 次元の魔法

天与呪縛 (TENYO JUBAKU):

heaven + heavensent / godgiven + curse + binding / restriction

無限の形 (MUGEN NO KATACHI):

infinite + limitless / form & shape (abstract or physical)

次元の魔法 (JIGEN NO MAHOU):

dimensional witch

what that means is that (i hate to even call it this for personal reasons) but "trauma" cycles in the sense that you re-enact the worst horrors that have been done to you infinitely, after you have surpassed a certain threshold of horror which means you can no longer "experience" terror in the same way. there is an emotion that persists beyond fear, and that "disables fear," to the point that you transform / are mutated into "a different animal."

i was talking with my special bnuuy about the way that some people treat my games like a walk in the dogpark when it is a hunting ground for a pack of wolves (i am every wolf) and they don't understand the ferocity and the life-threatening stakes and the depth of visceral, dark confession, and hope that rises from the deep.

i don't think of myself a person, and i am not treated like one.

i don't think of myself as a person, because i am not treated like one.

but these people who are human down to their bones (to be human is to dehumanize other things.) do not understand i am not like them, so they think i am presenting them a game that is a "playground" when for me it is my "hunting ground" and when they watch me "hunt" they think of it as a particularly spectacular dis/PLAY.

ELEVENTH is borne from the particular distaste / resentment / humiliation / lack of fear / inviolate pride / despair of being a hunting bird whose father wishes to cage a falcon and punish it for not singing like a canary, because a bird is a bird, isn't it? and a "girl" is a "girl."

nothing will violate INVIOLET'S composure. nor their rage. (except, for maybe SACROSANCT, their 天敵 heaven-designated enemy.)