the Cannot GET / issue is really fun still because i mostly know what's happening (an errant 404 is getting incorrectly edge cached and served to Fucking Everyone even if it actually fires exactly Once) but i don't really know what's happening (why the fuck is / ever serving a 404. that shouldn't happen. where is it breaking down. help)
so tomorrow i will fix the cache issue and hope that's enough that i literally never have to think about it again
