sometimes i wonder if i'm becoming prejudiced against neurotypical people. i saw a video that was like "people lie but energy doesn't" and talking about following your gut and cultivating your intuition and i honestly found myself thinking "i don't know if neurotypical people are capable of doing that"

i am going to get cancelled someday

i do the same thing in academia

me: sees an all male panel at a conference

me: oh. all men. this isn't going to be worth my time.

or

someone: i went to harvard

me: oh god this person is probably going to have the dullest ideas

it's a very real problem

and i find myself thinking things like "well if cis-het men didn't continually live up to the stereotype maybe i'd take them more seriously" but imagine a man thinking that about women. i really have become a man-hater. a full blown misandrist. i don't say these thoughts out loud in polite company of course but behind closed doors i'll absolutely drop my voice to a conspiratorial whisper and say, "you know what the real problem with this university is tho? they keep hiring unqualified white people."

please do not cancel me i'm trying to change, i promise i will be more accepting of people different from me

a neurotypical person gets mad and i'm like "oh you know how those typicals are, they just can't stand it when someone just says the truth out loud. it's not their fault they're pathological liars. be patient with them, they can't help it" in the most patronizing way