i've started using tumblr again. and with each new login comes a wave of nostalgia to wash over me. from revisiting blogs of friends i made on there a decade ago, to experiencing the idiosyncrasies of the site i forgot existed, to seeing posts i reblogged back in 2013 still being in circulation, it's been a journey. and looking back, honestly? i kept an impeccably curated blog. i've maintained that centralized hub for the type of visual styles, poetic themes, and moody atmospheres that are so appealing to me for the last 11 years. and the prevalence of comfort i feel in that content, specifically the images, has moved to the forefront of my blogging experience as i make my return home.
there's something... i don't know... calming? about a social media feed that is only meant to pleasure my neural pathways. one that is primarily built to satisfy my tastes and get me excited about what i'm looking at. it's purely a good-images-in / good-brain-chemicals-out transaction when i look at my dashboard. none of the trappings of other modern social media apps exist on tumblr. or more accurately they are easier to avoid over there. no, instead of being subject to a random 20-year-old's halfcocked take against my will, tumblr is predominantly focused on just ingesting some Vibes. and i'm all about a good vibe.
vibe check: i'm a scorpio, so being broody and romantic is kinda preprogrammed into me. i find beauty in the emotional. i find comfort in that which is spiritual and that which comes from inside the heart. the art, the memories, the positive associations that dig down deep and settle into my psyche are all burning expressions of humanity, expressions of the soul. they are what sticks out among the mundanity and cruelty of everyday life to me. visual media is perhaps the most prominent outlet for expressing such concepts. no matter how abstract, how messy, or how intentional, a static image will always be a portrait. and that portrait necessarily becomes the canvas for audience projection.
it stands to reason then, that every image we encounter begets a mental process by which meaning is formed. and rest assured, not all content needs a thorough definition to be ascribed that meaning. not every jpeg needs lore. but every form of visual stimuli does require passing through the barrier of our complicated minds to land an impression, even if it's a passing one.
the way our brains will carry out that work is fascinating to me. all of it happens on the back of a plethora of experiences we've had over our lifetimes. we are all not but the summation of every single interaction and lived experience we've ever had, after all. so our interpretations of what we see are based around that foundation of life experiences in aggregate. our tastes and worldviews likewise formed as a result of that exposure. we are then, informed by what has touched and moved us in the past. every new image to digest becoming another piece of the puzzle that is forever forming and rearranging itself in our brains, and mirroring back on what is already there.
so while not all jpegs need to have Things To Say, all of them do invite the opportunity to have something, anything, to be heard. what we are hearing then projects back onto that canvas. thus creating a new, separate portrait, one of a crystalized idea in our heads. and so our interpretation gets codified by the end of this interaction. the full cycle of a process that is fundamental to looking at any image; and one i've enjoyed having over and over again on tumblr lately.
for the pragmatic of you thinking i'm getting too flowery here, ian danskin has a wonderful video about art and meaning called The Artist is Absent that has a detailed breakdown of how human beings interpret language. within the breakdown ian explains this phenomena more beautifully and succinctly than i ever could. so, to borrow for a moment,
inside every brain are thoughts in a mother tongue spoken by only one person. and to speak and be heard is to go from one private language into a "shared code" and then into another private language. the translation is always imperfect.
[...]
all communication is collaborative. even when i'm the only one speaking, we make meaning together.
the jpeg, in my interpretation, is that shared code. when the creator wills one into existence it starts this cycle anew. giving those interacting with the jpeg the opportunity to ascribe a personal meaning to it that will never be the same as anyone else's. all communication is collaborative, or put another way, all art is inherently interpretative.
me personally, i like introspection. i like expressions of vulnerability. i like when things get messy, when they get abstract, when their messages are intentional. i find euphoria in intimate and emotional displays. so the type of content that i flock to ends up being highly personal. you can imagine then, that having a refuge for nothing but visual media that plays into those desires, would insight its own form of sentimentality. a unique comfort that comes in being allowed to yearn, to opine, to romanticize and to wear my heart on my sleeve. it's something all of the other government-mandated-five-apps-everyone-uses-these-days sorely lack. every time i log into tumblr, i am faced with the opportunity to openly engage in this interpretive dance. to romanticize a jpeg and allow that genuine expression contained within to be openly seen and heard. and i don't know, that feels very liberating to me right now.
it's a freeing feeling, akin to when i was active on the site years ago. back when tumblr was an exciting place where i met friends, gained hyperfixations and really formed my personality in realtime as a young adult. but eventually the site just became another feed. and the images, while still resonate, felt a bit more like a necessity to maintain a curated blog than artistic work to genuinely connect to. aesthetic upkeep, so to speak. but being back after several years of hiatus has invited this new magic. this freedom to get lost in other artist's ideas again. this feeling of immersion inextricable to art that inspires, art that captivates. that's really what i am trying to describe to you. there's passion to be found there again. inspiration and delight to be had on the platform once more. and the jpegs, my friend, the jpegs are plentiful.
whereas content on other apps tends to pass through me these days leaving zero impression, tumblr feeds me jpegs that warm my heart with love. jpegs that trigger a profound sadness within me. jpegs that light my eyes up with wonder. jpegs that make me introspective and melancholic. jpegs that exude a dark decrepit quality. jpegs that evoke a lingering nostalgia. jpegs that titillate, jpegs that frighten, jpegs that confuse, jpegs that intrigue, jpegs that make me uncomfortable. there's nostalgia, romance, elation and so much more in the jpegs i see every day. the feelings run the gamut but the consumption is always joyous; the emotions always bountiful.
maybe this feeling isn't so unique. maybe this is just what reconnecting with a platform that used to excite you feels like. maybe this is just what keeping an open my mind to embracing art in earnest does to an mf. either way, my sense of enthusiasm is through the roof right now, no matter where that feeling comes from. and i'm just blessed to have that in an online destination once again.
