discussed this with some friends and concluded that it's not nearly british enough, so i've produced this mockup of suggested improvements
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camera needs to be absolutely smashed in so close you can't really make out the shape of the level
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(not pictured) camera interpolates heavily so it takes three full seconds for it to catch up if you change direction
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camera tracks incredibly loosely; mario is usually 1/2" from the edge of the screen and there's no way to see what's coming before hitting it
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huge onscreen timer in awful, clashing color gradient
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publisher's name needs to take up a whole third of the screen
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mario needs to be visibly alcoholic. this is necessary.
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not pictured because i can't draw that well: mario should be a caricature with grotesquely exaggerated features and doofy, clueless expression. for some reason you can't see his eyes below the brim of his flat cap
