you are not a failure. you're not becoming worse over time. you're focusing more on the actually important things and less on what society thinks you should be. a job or lack thereof is not your life. it is not your value. you don't need to be "productive". you should have fun. you should do things that feel good as long as they aren't actively harming anyone. you should spend time with the people you care about and enjoy being with
link to original, NSFW warning for the whole website in general: https://hausofdecline.com/comics/gay/6/641206133970f0b36303d6ea